#telling me you don't care about how they get together
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Please please please bless me with more baby daddy Jason. I’m so obsessed with it 😭 just thought about if he caught you staring a little too long at him being a good father he would make fun of how sexy you find him and how you still want him
Oh, how this has lifted my mood after getting covid during the holiday season🙏I can totally see him getting cocky like that, too. Just imagine this man letting out a near-silent scoff as he catches your gaze wandering across his muscles as he picks up your daughter
BabyDaddy! Jason Todd Part 2
BabyDaddy! Jason Todd who doesn't actually bother you too much after that night you spent together. To your surprise, he doesn't expect much of anything in return. That moment simply turned into an unacknowledged secret that only the two of you would ever know about.
BabyDaddy! Jason Todd who still tries to show up to every little preschool function or birthday party your daughter has, despite the unspoken tension between you two. Despite what that little voice in your mind was screaming to do, you actually started inviting him to those kind of things. Typically, he would've just shown up unannounced.
BabyDaddy! Jason Todd who starts acting like your boyfriend or husband at parent-teacher conferences. On the rare occasion that the both of you show up to discuss your daughter with her teachers, they assume that you're together as a couple. Jason, ever the sly bastard, doesn't correct them.
You don't, either.
BabyDaddy! Jason Todd who actually starts playing into the role as soon as your 'relationship' gets brought up in public. If you happen to be sitting close enough, he'll grab your hand and start tracing invisible circles onto the back of it with his thumb. If you're really close, Jason will absolutely go as far as to sling an arm around your shoulders.
BabyDaddy! Jason Todd who is the biggest topic around the other single mothers at your daughter's daycare or preschool. Almost every time he makes an appearance, somebody asks for his number or tries to make small talk. He giggles like an idiot every time you have to scold him for giving them all the rejection hotline number.
BabyDaddy! Jason Todd who, when he does get asked about relationships by other women at your daughter's childcare facilities, will say that you're together in a committed relationship with no hesitation. He isn't really sure why he does it, either. It only really came about after you two slept together a few months ago.
To be fair, you do call Jason your boyfriend when a creepy guy asks you out.
BabyDaddy! Jason Todd who starts hanging out with you casually when he gets the chance. You've ripped him a new one a few too many times when telling him to keep out of excessive danger. What better way to spend his off time now that he doesn't do huge missions than being with his two favorite girls?
BabyDaddy! Jason Todd who somehow manages to blend right back into your life when he puts vigilante work to the side a little. He's there to pick up your daughter from day care or playdates when you need him to. He's cooking dinner for you and the little one on a rough day before you even have to ask.
BabyDaddy! Jason Todd who knows exactly how you feel about him. He sees the way your eyes linger as he stands in your kitchen cooking or how your gaze drifts to his biceps as he picks up your daughter to bring her to bed. "Eyes are up here, sweetness," is what he teases every time he catches your stares.
BabyDaddy! Jason Todd who is knocking on your door mere minutes after you've texted or called him having a breakdown when your daughter is at a sleepover. He doesn't even care what you're crying about, you're scooped up into his arms instantly. "Shhh... I have you," is one of the constant reassurances he mutters into your hair, "I'm right here. You're not alone."
BabyDaddy! Jason Todd who has you practically sitting on his lap as he holds you, his calloused hands rubbing up and down your back in a soothing motion. You don't even remember when the slipped under the hem of your (his old) shirt to rub gently at your bare skin.
BabyDaddy! Jason Todd who listens to you talk, no matter how stupid or silly your problems seem whe compared to his own. He knows better than to give advice other than when you ask for it, so he simplu holds you and listens. "I know, I know..." Is all he coos into your slightly mussed hair as his hands rub and massage your skin.
BabyDaddy! Jason Todd who waits until you're done speaking to move or say anything. "Look, baby..." You hate how much you still love the petname, "I know it's tough. Trust me, I know." You hate how you love him. "But I'm here, alright? I... I'm sorry I have a tendency to walk out on both of you, but... I'm here now. I'm here as whatever you need me to be. If you need me to stay for you and her, I will. If you need me to leave, I'll go without another thought."
"If you want to forget about what happened the other night, then we'll both forget about it. If you don't want to..." You didn't let him finish, instead capturing his slightly parted lips with your own.
BabyDaddy! Jason Todd who only pulls away when you do, the pupils of his beautiful green eyes dilated as he looks down at you in his lap. His hands never cease their movement caressing the fat and muscles of your back as he lets out a soft huff of amusement. "You're absolutely crazy getting involved with me voluntarily, doll face." Even as he tries to play it off, you can hear the affection and fondness in his voice.
BabyDaddy! Jason Todd who takes his time with you instead of rutting into you like an uncaged animal. His hands are slow as they roam across your body, relearning every single one of your curves and crevices like it's the first time he's seen your naked body. Each motion is filled with such care and adoration that you question why you ever split up, even if just for a moment.
BabyDaddy! Jason Todd who takes every single ounce of your stress away without trying. It doesn't matter that he's only slept with you once or twice in the past couple of years, he's drawing out every single orgasm he can from your pretty little pussy.
BabyDaddy! Jason Todd who says the nastiest things when hooking up with you. He absolutely gets off on the thought of getting you pregnant again, but he knows better after thinking about the situation the two of you are in. "You're fucking milking me for all I've got, ma," he grunts out as he pounds you relentlessly from behind, his large hands almost dwarfing your hips as he holds them for leverage, "I'm gonna fill this pussy up all over again. You'd like that, huh? You want another little me running around this joint?"
BabyDaddy! Jason Todd who, surprisingly, stays the morning after. It isn't picture perfect- nothing ever is- but it's still... Calm. Peaceful. Home. Like something you've never gotten with him before. The pair of you are still completely in the nude, your bodies tangled beneath the mess of sheets. But as your eyes flutter open with the first rays of morning light, the sight of Jason with small clumps of black and white hair stuck to his forehead from the previous night feels right.
BabyDaddy! Jason Todd who starts sticking around for a few days at a time after that. You're not sure just how it happened, but your daughter certainly loves it. She missed her daddy being around more often instead of being told that he was 'on a work trip' when it wasn't safe for Jason to see her.
BabyDaddy! Jason Todd who doesn't miss a beat when your sweet, innocent daughter asks if he's staying this time and if mommy will stay too. "Of course I am, baby girl," Jason, of course, makes direct eye contact with you as he says this before lifting the toddler into his lap. "Promise?" A smile. An actual, genuine smile that only she can get from him. "Promise."
How could you possibly say no to that?
Masterlist
#batfam#batfamily#batman#dc#redhood#jason todd x reader#jason todd x reader fluff#jason todd x reader smut#jason todd fluff#jason todd smut#jason todd#red hood x reader#red hood smut#red hood fluff#red hood#red hood x reader smut#red hood x reader fluff#arkham knight smut#arkham knight x reader#arkham knight#arkhamverse
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I cannot understate how clever and beautiful Penelope's response to wyfilwma is. In the original myth, Penelope literally isn't sure if the man before her is truly her husband, so she asks him to move a bed that is impossible to move. A fact about their relationship that only he could know. When he gets absolutely flabbergasted over this request, it's proof that it IS him.
In Epic there is only one change. Instead of Penelope being unsure, Odysseus is unsure of himself and feels like he would be unrecognizable to his wife. He keeps telling her over and over again, I am not the man you knew, and it's almost as though he's trying to convince himself, too. Like since he crossed every line he's killed all the gentleness in him, and he has to force himself to accept it. Penelope knows better, Penelope knows him. Instead of using their wedding bed as a way to prove it to herself, she proves it to him instead.
"See that wedding bed? Could you carry it over?
Lift it high on your shoulders and take it far away from here"
Shes talking about their bed but she is also talking about their love, their history, everything that makes up their marriage. Its like shes asking him, if you truly are someone else- here's everything that we used to be, everything that we built together, throw it out. You're not the same, right? Then surely you can detach yourself from it all.
But he cant. he cant he cant he cant and she knows that. The shock and the outrage and the pain of being asked to do such a thing hits him with a full force and he talks of how he made the bed, what its meant to them, why he couldnt possibly move it away.
"Do you realize what you have asked me?
The only way to move it is to cut it from its roots"
To cut it from the roots would be to sever their love entirely, it cant exist without what came before and what came before was the two of them. He fears thats what she wants, a completely uproot of their life together. But the fact that he fears it, truly deeply cares like a sentimental bastard, the fact that he could never not be the man who loves her is what she's been trying to show him all along.
"Only my husband knew that
So I guess that makes him you"
like my GOD. THIS LINE. He cannot be anything but her love because he is the only man who knows what they are to each other. She says it and that is final. Moving it is impossible because seperating the man he used to be from the man he is is impossible too. They are one in the same.
"I will fall in love with you over and over again
I don't care how, where, or when
No matter how long it's been, you're mine
Don't tell me you're not the same person
You're always my husband and I've been waiting, waiting"
She is not loving him by ignoring the trail of bodies in his wake and her love does not change the carnage-- in fact she is the reason for it, she knows this and she doesnt care. This is her husband now and always. And as long as bloodied hands will still hold her weaving ones he is the same exact man she's been waiting for.
It is such a beautiful message to leave your audience with. It is so perfect for Penelope as a character and the emotional weight this song has elevated my understanding of the odyssey and their relationship. Twenty years is so long, everything has changed, we have done unforgivable things to get home to each other-- because our home is each other. You are sharp and cruel and I am cunning and so so angry and we are both so tired but guess fucking what, I love you. No matter how long its been, youre mine.
#epic the musical#epic the ithaca saga#odypen#this is my tribute to this musical <3 i was gonna draw something but analysis felt more fitting#i cannot breathe when i think about this song#ill miss you epic saga releases :(
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I'm sorry but omega harem member Shen Yuan AU now has me in a choke hold-
Like,
Binghe is trying to find the perfect way to seduce Shen Yuan, because god knows he needs a miracle to unfuck up his entire 'I don't care for you, its just political' situation
Universe does its thing and sends a wife plot, Shen Yuan gets poisoned with some fuck or die plant when helping one of the wives meet with their family in a very dangerous section of the demon realm.
Binghe hears about his omegas poisoning and jumps at the chance to finally get closer to his A-Yuan. this! This is familiar to him, he's saved his wives from all kinds of poisons and aphrodisiac fueled heats before, he'd fuck him so good and show how great of an alpha he could be to him.
Only when he makes it there, Shen Yuans already been serviced by his bodyguard Liu Qingge. (its LITERALLY his job to save and service this omega, of course he fucked the poison out of him)
Turns out the news had reached Binghe far too late to be put to any use, partly do to Shen Yuan begging the wife he had been helping when he was poisoned to not bother Binghe with it. He just doesn't want to force Binghe to take care of him! (Binghe had just gotten back with a new wife too! Imagine how pissed he'd be if he interrupted them!)
The wife takes Shen Yuans insistence and worry as him being terrified of Binghe so of course she couldn't bring herself to tell the demon emperor (as should have been protocol). And if she actively helped hide his condition then it wasn't like anyone would rat her out for it, at least not after she told them how scared Shen Yuan had been of his Alpha husband. (Cue them believing that Shen Yuans wedding night must have been traumatising or something) rumors only spiral when an omega will take dealing with a deadly poison over fucking their literal husband.
So by the time the news reached Binghe it had already been a day. Bonus points if he walks in on Liu Qingge still inside his husband who's completely out of it from being throughly ravished for 12+ hours on and off to get the poison completely out of his system.
The stand off would be prime tea for the harem but absolutely terrifying to anyone who actually witnessed it. Binghe seething as his temper flairs to record levels.
"under what authority did you decide you could take such advances with MY omega."
"It's my job."
"No. its Mine."
"I was told you wouldn't be here"
"Well clearly I'm here now."
"Now is too late. he'd have been dead by now."
"...What?"
"He was poisoned yesterday. He'd have been dead by now."
And Liu Qingge isn't even being judgemental, I mean why would he be, this is a part of his job and a very enjoyable one at that. But Binghe is crumbling mentally as he tries to piece together how things went so wrong: Why wasn't he informed immediately? How had this been kept from him? Was someone trying to kill Shen Yuan? And now he wonders HOW exactly had his omega gotten poisoned?
The impulsive thoughts come too, he wants this bodyguard fired. But if he fired the man who saved his omega now, it would only seem like he'd wanted Shen Yuan dead.
An even uglier, more desperate part of him wanted to purposefully poison Shen Yuan with a poison only HE could cure, to have Shen Yuan need him.
POISONING YOUR HUSBAND AS FOREPLAY .... God I love binggeyuan and liushen, just the most emotionally dense people imaginable falling for each other
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love, pancakes & robots
sae x reader fluff (suggestive) for @pixelcafe-network 's challenge friday!
excerpt: "You," you stab him in the chest with a finger. "Are a robot whisperer."
"I read the instructions on the box like a normal person."
"I did too!"
"Oh really? You can read? That's surprising." He grips your wrist before you can smack him again, eyeing you playfully like he's just daring you to try, pulling you in until his arms are wrapped around you.
“What are you doing?”
Looking for you the moment he's up is rare for Sae. It's the weekend, you love to sleep in, and he's usually heavy enough to keep you tucked into him even if you rise first.
“I was trying to make pancakes." There's a set of ingredients to your left, a plate of half-baked and burnt ones to your right…
"Doesn't look like it's working."
He says the comment off-handedly, but you catch that almost-grin of his before he manages to turn away and you shove him, your hand meeting the hard muscle of his chest. He barely budges, but he presses a hand to himself like you knocked the wind out of him, eyes wide with faux-pain that finally has you out of your pancake-making stoop and laughing.
"It's a fancy pancake maker! The one we got gifted, remember? They're meant to pop out perfectly every time."
"Y'know, there's nothing wrong with making them the old fashioned way." He grabs the box to the side, casually flipping it in his hands.
"This is new tech, Sae! New tech! It's supposed to just spit a pancake out at you like a robot!"
"Like that dumpling maker that doesn't actually roll a dumpling together no matter how you put it in?"
You wave your hand. "That's just proof that dumplings need to be folded with hands and made with love."
"Hmm," Sae puts the box down, pours the pancake mix in along with some chocolate chips.
It pops out perfectly.
"You," you stab him in the chest with a finger. "Are a robot whisperer."
"I read the instructions on the box like a normal person."
"I did too!"
"Oh really? You can read? That's surprising." He grips your wrist before you can smack him again, eyeing you playfully like he's just daring you to try, pulling you in until his arms are wrapped around you.
He dips his head to speak softly in your ear. "Maybe the robot just likes me better."
You pull away from him, tapping your hands on his cheeks. "Then the robot is misogynistic."
"A robot with skewed moral values? Governments might start using it for politics."
He spins you around in his arms so you're both facing the pancake maker, where he pours it in again and watches as it chucks out yet another perfect piece. The pure shock on your face has him chuckling into your shoulder, pressing a kiss to your cheek.
"It's alright. I love you enough for both me and the robot."
He squeezes your waist, and you miss his warmth immediately as he moves towards the doorway.
"Hey! Come back here and do the rest, magic robot man!"
"Mm," he makes an act of considering it, tilting his head. "What do I get in return?"
"Outside of chocolate pancakes?"
"You know I don't care about pancakes." He swoops towards you fast and lifts you up by your thighs, placing you on the countertop, hands on either side of you as he leans in. "So?"
"Well," you wrap your arms around his neck, bringing him in even closer, "what do you want?"
He grips the back of your calves, tipping you until you're lying flat on the counter, looming above you.
"I think it's clear," he tells you in a low tone, "what I want."
"Sae," Heat rushes through you, hyperaware of everything -- how warm his hands are, the cool countertop underneath you, the way his stature is the only thing that makes a position like this even possible.
"Pancakes first, you try to tell him, your heart beating fast in your chest, "or we'll never eat today."
"You sure?" He presses a kiss to the inside of your knee, then one higher up, and it has you gripping at his hand.
"We eat at this table."
"Who says that's not what I'm about to do?"
"You're cruel."
this is my first time doing a challenge!! the prompt i was given was: “What are you doing?” “I was trying to make pancakes but it didn’t exactly work” i hope i've done it justice!!
#sae x reader#sae x you#sae x y/n#itoshi sae x reader#sae itoshi x reader#sae itoshi x you#sae itoshi x y/n#itoshi sae x you#itoshi sae x y/n#bllk x reader#blue lock x reader#fragments of memories: drabble
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On a Wing and a Prayer
Part 7 - Well This Is Awkward
CW: Angst, mention's of alcohol, mentions of panic attack's, mental health, mentions of injuries, mentions of death.
Did I mention I like medical dramas?
Previous parts - masterlist - next
Your therapist is nice. You’ve been going to her for the past 3 months, you were only supposed to go for a single session. Then the army insisted on more. Johnny was sent home on medical leave a few days after you left. He came to see you and stayed the night.
The next morning you had to tell him to leave, it just wasn’t the same.
‘I’ll be staying at the house if you want to visit?’
Shit, you forgot about the house. The place you all pitched in to buy, so you all had somewhere to stay when you were on leave. Everyone’s flats are too small to accommodate all 5 of you. Besides, flat hopping everyday across London was expensive.
‘I’ll talk to John when he’s back.’ All you want back is the deposit.
“Do you feel guilty?” She asks you. It snaps you out of your thoughts and you turn to look at her.
“No.” You say, she hums. You hate it when she does that. You don’t know why it is a particularly tough session. You just want to go home. “They hurt me. I don't feel guilty about that.”
“You left the unit though.” Bitch. “It’s okay to feel guilty about that.”
“Okay fine. I feel guilty about leaving Johnny and Kyle.” You snap back. Anything to get her to sign you off so you can go. You look up at the clock, you still have at least 40 minutes left in this season.
“Have you got your letter from the university yet?” She asks changing the subject. You nod. After a few weeks of crying on the bathroom floor and drowning yourself in bottles of vodka you decided to get your shit together.
“That’s good, what's the plan going forward?”
“I’ll be posted on a base somewhere where I can get hands-on experience in trauma care. With studying on the side.” You say without going too much into the complications.
“So the army is actively helping you, that's good.”
“Yeah I think they’re willing to do anything so long as I don’t sue them.” You scoff under your breath. She hums.
You don’t know how true that is, maybe it’s just something you tell yourself so you don’t feel so conflicted over how accommodating they’ve been. They’re paying your uni bills and even got you one some army teaching program aimed to fast track you through the ranks.
“What about Kyle and Johnny? Have you heard from them since you spoke to them last?” Fucking bitch. You sigh, turning away from her. The last time you spoke to them was almost a month ago. They text you from time to time, try to call you.
You’ve ignored them, so much that you feel like anything you say to them will just be meaningless.
“Yeah, they’re deployed.” You lie. She smiles. You look back up at the clock.
30 minutes to go.
______________________
Iraq is hot. That you expected but the hospital’s electricity is sketchy at best. You have to keep the air-con off to make sure the ventilators don’t cut out. The US built this place, you’re only supposed to be here for another week at least before you’ll move again.
As soon as the electric is fixed it will be handed over to the UN to run, until then it was getting a dry run as a combat hospital. Lots of blown off limbs and bullets to pull out people. Lots of death.
You told Johnny and Kyle where you were going when you got your placement. You’re trying to patch things up with them after basically leaving them on read for almost 3 months. Your therapist said it would be a good thing to do.
The sun is setting, you're sitting outside watching as it touches the top of the distant mountains. The place is busy, friendly forces are still pretty much living here. It’s the only safe zone in this part of the desert, why the UN wanted a hospital out here you’ll never know.
Something about re-urbanisation of previously controlled territories. You don’t care, you're here to pull bullets out of people and save lives. Other than your mentor-Dr. Sands-you’re the only other doctor on the base. Doctor is a loose term, you’re technically still a student, but you ace all your skills labs, and the army is begging for help apparently.
You let out a breath, finishing the rest of your drink and getting up and pulling your white lab coat on.
“Well, fancy seeing you ‘ere.” You hear a familiar thick accent behind you. You turn to see Johnny standing behind you.
What the fuck.
You’re hugging him before you can stop yourself. You see Kyle, John and Simon stood behind him. They’re all geared up, weapons slung over their chest or back.
You thought you would feel something when you saw them. Maybe you'd want to run, scream, cry, anything. You feel nothing, just numbness.
“What are you doing here?” You ask.
“Oh you know, Shepherd says jump, we say how high.” he says nudging you, it makes you smile and you shake your head.
“Finally going for the MD?” He asks, pointing at the student doctor tag on your coat.
“Yeah well, you like putting bullets in people. I like pulling them out.”
“Oh yeah not even the occasional love tap?” He jokes, throwing his arm around your shoulders.
“Only the bad guys.” You reply. You look up at Kyle who’s smiling. Then John and Simon.
“You look good.” John says.
“Yeah well that’s what 6 months of therapy will do to you.” It’s bitter, harsher than you expected it to be. It’s the first time you’ve spoken to him in 6 maybe 7 months. He hasn’t changed a bit. He still smiles at you, his body language open, his hands on his hips.
Simon stands with his arms crossed, his presence is looming, making hairs stand up on the back of your neck.
“It’s good to see you again.” Kyle says, you nod at him.
“Oh when we’re back we should catch a bite to eat.” Johnny says enthusiastically, moving away over to Kyle.
“You can tell us what to avoid in the mess.” Kyle adds. You smile again. You go to open your mouth but your pager beeps. You look down at it. It’s the doctor.
“Yeah, when you’re back, come find me.” You say turning into the building.
“Stay safe!” Johnny calls.
“Yeah you too!” You call back pulling your radio off your hip. When you make it through the door you squeeze your eyes closed for a second and let out a long breath.
Now you hate this hospital even more.
______________________
It’s dark out now. You look over at the clock and it's almost midnight. You’re sat at the nurses station listening to them talk about whatever drama is going on in the next base. You still can’t believe you ended up in the same base as 141.
They’ll be gone soon, even Johnny seemed surprised, maybe he thought you’d be gone by now. Now you have to eat with them at some point. Johnny and Kyle at least.
The doctor left an hour ago to go to another base for a surgery. You’re used to this taking the night shifts. Normally you just sleep and get woken up a few times for the nurses to ask for medication changes. You’ve only ever had one trauma come in at night and the doctor was there to help you with the limited night time staff.
You tried to sleep but you couldn’t, you were restless trying to think about what they were doing here? Who were they after? How long would they be here? At least at the nurses station you can listen to the nurses and let their gossip distract you.
The red trauma phone rings. For a second you think it’s a joke, it’s the normal phone. Nope, the red light is flashing on it. You stand up picking it up.
“Trauma.” You say.
“Got one incoming, ETA 15 minutes. GSW to the chest, breathing unconscious. 30 year old male.” You hear an American voice say as you write it down. You don’t have time to worry or be nervous. This is what you live for, you let the adrenaline pump through you. It clears your mind as you take down the information.
“Copy, what’s the name?”
“Riley.” Your heart stops.
“Say again?”
“Riley, Simon Riley.”
It feels like all the air has been sucked out of your lungs. You’re squeezing the phone in your hand, the pen has fallen to the floor. You look over at the nurses already pulling gowns on and getting into position in the resus bay.
You don’t even register saying copy and putting the phone back. You turn away from the nurses braising yourself on a filing cabernet.
Simon’s shot. All you can see is his face, his body covered in blood. He’s always so careful, he’s always the one dragging people out the field not getting shot. Something must have gone horribly wrong.
You weren't there. He’s shot and you weren't there to save him.
You suck in breaths of air, the adrenaline isn’t helping now.
“Doctor?” You hear one of the nurses call. You turn to look at them, you have to keep it together.
“Page the doctor.”
next
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#call of duty#fanfic#cod#simon ghost riley#john soap mactavish#john price#ghost cod#kyle gaz garrick#kyle gaz x reader#kyle garrick#kyle gaz x you#simon ghost riley x reader#simon ghost x reader#simon ghost x you#simon x reader#simon riley x reader#simon riley x you#taskforce 141#poly 141#poly 141 x reader#tf 141 x reader#task force 141#cod 141#john price x reader#captain john price#price x reader#john price x you#johnny soap mctavish x reader#johnny soap mactavish#johnny soap mctavish x you
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I'm having a shit day, I need Quinn to fix it
Please and thanks
Rain, rain, go away, come again...when you didn't have a hundred errands to run and were short on time to do them. Naturally, it would pour the entire time you were out and about, and your umbrella had decided to break the first time you went to use it. It really set the tone for the rest of the day; a terrible foreshadowing you had hoped wouldn't be the case.
The only reason you were out running those errands in the first place was because you had taken the day off to make sure everything was nice for when Quinn got back home. You knew he was going to be exhausted after finishing another six straight games on the road. Plus, you wanted to enjoy the evening with him knowing nothing would be looming in the back of your mind that would take away from your time together. However, since the minute you got up it was like everything was stacked against you. You had slept through your alarm, getting up almost two hours later than you had intended. You thought you had plugged in your phone but hadn't make a proper connection so your battery was at 12% to start the day. And to add insult to injury (literally), you had dropped a glass while in the kitchen and had cut your hand while trying to pick up the pieces.
Today was proving to be one of those days that were best spent at home, but unfortunately, that wouldn't be the case for you. By this point, your phone was now sitting at 6%, because you realized, after you had left the parking garage, that the charger you left in your car was in Quinn's. You just hoped it would hold on long enough to get you home.
You would be stopped at a red light, mid rush hour, when a message would ding in. It was Quinn and the dreaded text you didn't want to come across your phone until you were already back at his apartment.
"Hey baby, we just touched down. I'll see you soon. I love you."
"I might not be there when you get home. Stuck in traffic. </3 I love you, too. <3 <3 Also, phone is about dead. >:("
"Just be careful. I've missed you."
"I've missed you, too."
- - -
Getting everything out of the car had been hard enough, but carrying them with your cut palm was the worst. Being half asleep and dealing with broken glass was not a good combination, something you would note for the future. Sure, you couldn't have texted Quinn to see if he would help you, which you knew he would have, but you were determined to get it done yourself.
When you stepped into the elevator, from the parking garage, all you could think of was "please don't break down. I do not want to walk up the stairs. I do not want to be trapped in an elevator with a dead phone." Thinking it was a bad idea to put such thoughts into the Universe, you'd just count floors instead until you reached Quinn's.
It was a struggle to unlock the door but you had managed though your hand was burning and you were pretty sure you were bleeding again. Just something else that would get tended to later. Once inside, you'd drop everything at the door and Quinn would come from the bedroom to greet you.
"Oh sweetheart, why didn't you tell me you were downstairs? I would have helped you with all of this." He wrapped his arms around you and you melt into his body. "I have missed you so much."
"I'm so glad you're home." All of a sudden and without warning, you begin to cry. Likely a culmination of trash sleep, stress, no food, and pain. Your body and emotions were just fried; not to mention you hated when he was gone for so long.
"What's wrong, baby?" Quinn would say softly, gently tightening his hold on you. "Are you alright?" Anytime you were having a rough day, he was the first person to notice and always did everything he could to make you feel better.
"No," you said, hiding your face in his neck. You weren't ready to have him see how much you were struggling.
"Why don't you go sit, hmm? I'll get this."
"I wanted to have everything done for you but today has been awful."
Quinn pulls away from you just enough to tip your chin up towards his face. You can't escape him now and the look on your face makes his puppy eyes heavy with emotion. "Oh, baby~"
He kisses you several times, each one of them sweeter than the last, yet the tears still continue to fall from your cheeks. "Come on, this stuff can wait."
Taking your non-bandaged hand, he ushers you to the sofa where he insists you sit in his lap so you can be as close to him as possible. You loved moments like these just on better circumstances than today had given you.
"Baby, you're bleeding. What happened?"
You had reached up to brush some hair from your eyes when he caught sight of the bandage now tinged bright red in the center. You dropped your hand to your leg and shook your head. "It's nothing. Just a clumsy accident."
"Let me see."
You refuse, sniffling and trying to hold back the welling tears.
"Please?"
Damn those eyes of his; damn the tone of his voice that just took your breath away. You could never truly tell him no and this was no different. You'd turn your palm upwards when you presented it to him, scared it was worse that you thought it was initially.
"May I look at it?"
You just nod, before laying your head against his shoulder. You didn't want to see it and you knew him pulling back the adhesive of the bandage was going to hurt, even though he had the softest touch.
Quinn was always so careful with you; always asking for permission especially if it would potentially cause you pain. Slowly he'd remove the bandage and you would wince against the discomfort even though he did everything he could to make it easy on you. "How did this happen?"
Quinn's tone conveyed deep worry and hurt and that didn't give you the reassurance you were hoping for.
"This morning. I got up late, and was half asleep taking my vitamins and I guess my hand just stopped working and I dropped it. It shattered everywhere. I didn't realize I had grabbed the raw edge until it was too late and I cut myself."
"Oh sweetheart," Quinn whispered laying his head against yours. "Want me to fix you up?"
"I'll get it."
"Please?"
Twice now, he had used that word with (that) tone, and twice now you would fold without another chance to resist. Again, you would silently nod, letting him slip out from under you while he disappeared into the bathroom for a few moments. You remembered how you had left it and it made you feel worse, but when he returned, the only thing that mattered to him was making sure you were alright.
"You said today was awful, how come?" He talked to you while he worked so to keep you from focusing solely on your hand and the pain. Everything he did was so thoughtful.
"I stayed up too late watching The First 48, then I slept through my alarms this morning, so I was two hours behind. I guess I hadn't clicked my charger into my phone fully so it didn't charge. I dropped the glass. I didn't get the apartment cleaned. I didn't get the laundry put away. I forgot my charger was in your car. My umbrella broke." With each added reason for the bad day it made you more emotional to the point that he had to stop cleaning the cut to lay a hand on your leg and try to calm you.
"Shhh, baby, baby, it's okay. None of that matters now. I didn't expect you to be waiting for me at the door. I'm just glad you're here now, but I'm sorry you had such a hard day. The apartment is fine, please, don't worry about it."
"But...I left the bathroom~"
"I don't care about it. Honest. I want you to feel welcome here; I want it to be your home. Home should feel lived in." Quinn leaned forward to kiss you yet you frown. You still felt so bad for everything not being done like you wanted it to be. "If you're here, that's all I want."
"You're so nice," you squeak out, hiding your face with your free hand. You don't realize you were breaking his heart, feeling so bad about missing your self-imposed marks.
"Sweetheart, will you look at me, please?"
Dropping your hand, you let your eyes be exposed though you keep it pressed to your lips.
"You're the only thing I care about when I'm here. If you're okay, I'm okay."
"But I'm not okay."
"And I'm not either. May I finish this for you?" His smile was so sweet, so heartfelt as he held your injured hand in both of his. When you answered "yes, please" Quinn brought it to his lips before finishing what he had started. With each new step of the process, he'd check in with you before continuing. He didn't feel that you had any glass in the wound or that you needed stitches, but he didn't want you to do too much the next few days.
"Alright, babe, all done."
"Thank you."
"Of course. Anything for you," his smile continues. "How about you go change your clothes, get into something comfortable and we'll have a lazy evening in bed. I'll get the groceries put away and we'll order take out. How's that?"
"Do you want some help?"
"No babe, I can get it. It won't take me that long, but thank you. I'll meet you in there, okay?"
"Okay." You give him a kiss as a thank you, later apologizing for your mild breakdown earlier.
"It's alright. You're only human, sweetheart and you had a bad day. I can't say I'd do much better. I'd never judge you for anything like that," Quinn replies, holding your face for another kiss. "I promise."
#so sorry you're having a bad day - anon#I hope this helps a little#quinn hughes#quinn hughes imagine#quinn hughes x reader#quinn hughes fic#quinn hughes one shot#quinn hughes fanfiction#hockey fic#hockey fanfiction#hockey oneshot#hockey imagine#nhl imagine#nhl one shot#nhl fic#nhl fanfiction
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🍫•SEONGHWA ONE-SHOT•🍫
���✧˖°🍒Hot chocolate🍒♡✧˖°
Warnings//genre:: SMUT, DRUGGING/APHRODISIACS, mutual masturbation, oral (f rec) face fucking, creampie, sweat fetish, marking,
Pairing:: dom!seonghwa x sub!fem!reader
A/N:: I really don't know what to say...I hope yall like this tho, I worked hard on it 🙏
As you stirred the forbidden sweets into the hot chocolate you were making for you and your boyfriend you think back on what he had said a few weeks ago. "Wouldn't it be fun to try some aphrodisiacs?" He brought it up at the most random time. On another occasion, he mentioned putting it in cake or cookies as a surprise but never actually did it but today, you made the move. "Is it almost done?" Seonghwa asks warmly from the livingroom and you smile with a nod before carrying the cups out to the living room couch where you'd be watching your movie.
You and Seonghwa just came back from taking a walk out in the snowfall at night and though it was magical and aesthetic it was so cold. The two of you decided to snuggle up with some hot cocoa and watch a movie but you thought it'd be fun to sneak some aphrodisiacs into your drinks. He wouldn't mind...right?
You give him his cup and he's completely unsuspecting. You get about twenty minutes into the movie and he hasn't taken a single sip of it, because it was too hot, but you get worried that he might've caught you. You continue as if everything is normal, cuddling up beside him and taking occasional sips. You knew what was in it but you wanted to see. natural. You then saw him beginning to drink it and suddenly, his drink is gone.
We're honestly excited at the fact that a, he didn't catch you, and b, he was gonna be unbearably horny in about 15 minutes and you couldn't wait to see how he'd react. It began with him shifting a lot beside you and then clearing his throat more than usual. You take a quick glance up at him and you can tell he is flushed, but you don't assist him. Instead, you wait for him to confess his dilemma.
"Is it hot in here or is it just me?" He says as he breathes heavily, you swear you could see the puff of warmth from his breath like a sex scene in those BL Mangas.
"It's a little warm," you nod. "Could be all the hot chocolate you chugged," you tease and poke his chest and you can see the struggle in his eyes. Seonghwa fights to seem calm and normal but on the inside, he is panicking. He can feel the sweat building along his body, his heart thumping in his ears to the same rhythm as his cock just aching to beat inside of you. His breath always seems out of reach as he inhales sharply.
"Baby, I feel like something is wrong," he slicks his hair back as he feels a glob of precum trail down his cock and soak his pajamas. You set down your cup and turn to him.
"What's up, baby?" You look up at him trying to hide your smile as he pants but he only grumbles in response, not sure how to tell you how he's feeling.
"It's like...I'm so horny it hurts but I don't know why? It just started for no reason," Seonghwa explains as you examine his fucked up features, pink cheeks, glossy eyes, and that dark haze hiding beneath his pupils that are blown out. You officially can't hide your smile anymore and turn into a little smirk to play it off in this situation. "Why are you smiling?" His voice is weary as if he is putting the piecing of the puzzle together in his head as he talks.
"I'm not!" You protest but Seonghwa is already on your trail. "Just since you're feeling this way we could indulge in some...activities," You smirk and Seonghwa's breath hitches at your words.
"Not until you tell me why this is happening," Seonghwa grins and you let out a sigh.
"Fine. I melted some aphrodisiacs into our hot chocolate," You confess and Seonghwa's jaw drops. He finally pauses the TV as he takes a deep breath.
"I should be pissed at you," He begins and you nod in understanding. "But I am way too fucking hard to care," He pulls you closer, resting you on his lap. As he pulls you up you feel his raging boner against your clothed pussy. You take a glance down out of curiosity and his sweatpants are strained into a tent with a dark, wet patch at the tip. Seonghwa smirks as he follows your eyes, making eye contact when you look back at him. "I'm not in the mood to be patient and it's your fault so you're gonna take it," Seonghwa practically rips his clothes off before kneading and clawing at yours. He starts with your shirt before moving lower, yanking off your pants and panties to reveal your soaked and throbbing cunt. He picks you up by your thighs and plops you back down on the couch. He snaps your legs open and, without warning, he wraps his swollen and wet lips along your pussy lips.
"Fuck, Seonghwa!" You jump as your legs jolt up and already you can feel the aphrodisiacs working. Every time his tongue grazes over any sort of sensitive area you feel like you could scream in pleasure, but instead, you just grab and yank his hair.
Seonghwa sucks one of your little folds into his mouth before rolling it back and forth along his tongue. You let out a loud cry as your back arches and it only stirs him on more; the way he was eating you out was like he hadn't eaten in months, like he was deprived of a feast for years and he finally got his chance to be feral. The room fills you with the sound of him slurping, sucking, spitting, and moaning along with your squeals and sobs. "I-I'm close," You sob out and Seonghwa drags his tongue along your slit, poking his tongue into your entrance. His hands come around to grope your thighs leaving red marks. You felt as though it was too early to cum but due to the aphrodisiac, you didn't care.
You then let the band snap in your stomach and you cum into Seonghwa's mouth, your hands matted in his hair as you do so. Seonghwa drinks up your arousal instantly and as soon as he's satisfied he's standing up again. He sits down beside you as you pant. He leans over to look up at you, those big boba eyes silently pleading for something.
"Baby, can we masturbate together?" he asks straight up and your eyes widen. His hand was already lingering around his twitching cock that was constantly leaking precum.
"S-Sure," you smile with a soft nod. You felt flustered by his direct question but you drew yourself back into the moment. Seonghwa softly palms his tip as he moans directly into your ear, his moans are soft and rather quiet but there is a hidden desperation in them. You hesitantly bring your fingers down between your legs, running a finger up your slit to collect up some of the arousal and cum there. You dip a finger inside yourself with ease and gasp softly, the feeling of your finger being squeezed and the intrusion in your pussy. Seonghwa is directly watching as he strokes his cock slowly, his arousal sticking to his hand loudly.
"Just like that darling," he kisses your jaw between moans. "You're so fucking hot," he bites his lip and you feel like you're masturbating with a stranger; it's been a long time since you've seen Seonghwa so lustful and dirty. There's this raw hunger in his voice that makes your spine tingle. He watches the way your fingers are drawn back out from your tight heat and he can't stop staring. "I could cum right fucking now baby," he growls as he fists himself harder, the side of his hand slapping against the base of his shaft.
Seonghwa's raw desire begins to rub off on you as he presses his sweaty body against yours. Without warning he jumps over the edge, cumming onto your stomach. You gasp softly as you watch his load spurt out onto your body. Your face flushes and your fingers slow, watching his massive load spill over. "Want my cock in your mouth babygirl," he brings his leg up to rest on the arm of the couch as he grabs your head. You gasp in surprise but your mouth is quickly filled with his cock. Seonghwa was acting so abruptly and demanding, not even giving you seconds to process what he was saying or doing.
He gently rolls his hips back and forth, forcing his cock to glide in and out of your mouth. "You're doing so good," he throws his head back as he holds your head, his hands tangled in your hair. "I know I'm being...forceful but I can't fucking help it," he whines lowly as sweat drips down his neck, bobbing along with his Adam's apple. He lets out a choked whimper. "As soon as I cum I feel like I'm gonna cum again...I feel like I fucking animal in heat," his fist tightens in your hair as his hips move harder, gagging you. Tears build in his eyes as he teeters over the edge. "Just a little longer..." he drops his head forward as he groans, sweat dripping off from the tip of his nose onto your chest.
He then unloads in your mouth, cramming his cock in your jaw. "Good girl," he growls loudly. He pulls his cock out quickly and watches as his cum pours from your mouth, his cock hardening again almost instantly. You cough softly before speaking.
"I'm sorry hwa, I didn't know it was that strong," you apologize sincerely, and he quickly pins you to the couch again.
"Don't apologize...I love it," he smirks softly and you watch as the sweat drips down his face. He lines his cock up with your entrance, rubbing his tip against it. "Let me fuck you, please," his head falls to your chest, his forehead leaving a print of sweat. "Just wanna fuck you, fill you up, make you mine," he whines before kissing your chest. "Make you scream," he trails his hands down your sides. "I know I've been rushing all night but..." he lets out a choked groan. "I need you," He sighs as he picks up his head to gauge your reaction.
"It is my fault you feel this way so..." You look down shyly before meeting his gaze. "Use me baby, use me until you're satisfied," You caress the side of his face, your hand collecting up some of the sweat. Seonghwa grins before pushing his hips forward, moaning as you envelop his cock with your tight heat.
"I'll try to go slow," He says between gentle groans.
"Don't worry about it. Use me until the buzz is gone," You smile softly and tangle your fingers into his damp hair. The long dark strands sticking to your hand. His hips move slow at first, taking his time to allow the pleasure between the two of you to build up, but eventually Seonghwa falls to his own lust once again. Seonghwa pants heavily as he pounds into you, his desire now building and slowly taking over.
"Can I cum inside baby?" He asks just to be sure.
"Of course," You nod with shaky breath, his cock never loses it's pace. His hips snap harder against yours as his breathing quickens as he grips onto your hips.
"Wanna fill you up and make you cum at the same time," He groans before leaning down, wrapping his arms around your body as his body weight begins to rest lightly against yours. "Are you getting close baby?" He asks as he feels your walls grip his cock. You nod in response and he smirks before biting your neck, sucking on the sweet and soft skin. His hands ghost over your body with a slight tremble of raw desire and hunger. "Cum for me," he growls into your ear. "Wanna see you feelin' good," he says before groaning, his cock twitching inside you.
You dig your nails into his back as the pleasure builds on layers, stacking one after another until your tumbling over.
"S-Seonghwa," you gasp softly as he smirks softly as he feels your warm wetness coating him.
"Good girl, Shh," he pets your hair before reaching his peak as well, his hot seed spurting out inside you. "Fuck," he gasps as his body goes limp against yours. "You did so good, I love you so much," he moans as he rests his sweaty head on your chest. He shakily wraps his arms around you and holds you close as he pants heavily. "I think I've worn it all out," he sighs. "I'm exhausted," Seonghwa chuckles softly and you smile before slicking back his hair
#ateez x reader#ateez fanfic#ateez smut#ateez hard hours#ateez hard thoughts#ateez scenarios#ateez seonghwa#ateez fic#seonghwa smut#park seonghwa smut#park seonghwa x reader#park seonghwa#seonghwa#ateez#ateez x female reader
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what is grief? ; lighter x gn! reader
author's note: happiest birthday to my baby Lighter! This is a birthday gift from me to you! I am posting just in time before his birthday ends in my timezone, so this fic may have some grammar mistakes and I apologize for that. But my brainrot when I saw Lighter's birthday art has returned and I just had to write a fic in just one sitting inspired by his bday art. This is an interpretation of the art, and I have shaped it to what I thought could be possible.
warnings for subtle hints of Lighter's trust events! sprinkle in survivor's guilt and you have a traumatized man.
this fic is also a continuation of this fic that i have posted before, so i recommend reading it first before reading.
enjoy!
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“Researcher!” You full on bodily flinched when that familiar nickname only the people in the Outer Ring called you. You fumbled your notes in your hands as Caesar yelled through the quiet space of your camp. You checked the time on your watch, 11:41 a.m. It wasn't even near the time where you were supposed to be picked up to return back to Blazewood.
You sighed to yourself before turning to look at the approaching figure of the soon-to-be leader of the Sons of Calydon.
“Caesar.” You greeted plainly, still a little spooked by her sudden call. Her grin was wide and bright like the sun in the background, you narrowed your eyes at her, silently staring at her (not so unusual) cheery self.
“You're early.” You stated, watching as she shifted her feet in excitement. “Big Daddy's busy again?”
“He's busy alright.” Caesar says cheerfully, you furrowed your brows at her in confusion.
“Researcher~ Don't you know what day it is?” Caesar's mood slightly dampened at your lack of enthusiasm, you only gave her a deadpan look.
“Care to tell me what's gotten you excited?” You asked as you shuffled your notes to make it more organized.
“Y'know Lighter right?” Caesar asked.
“Of course I know him, Caesar. We've been roommates for a while now.” You sighed.
“Well, since you've been roommates for so long, you should know it's his birthday today.” Caesar huffed, you looked up from your notes in surprise.
“It's December 27th right?” You blinked at her as Caesar sighed. “It is. You two are practically living together, how do you not know this?”
You cleared your throat as heat traveled to your face, you looked away in embarrassment as you mumbled out, “Well, he's not really the most talkative person…”
“To make up for it,” Caesar announced, grabbing you by your arm to drag you to her bike. “You're helping us plan the party!”
—
The Sons of Calydon were good with most things, mainly, getting the job done.
But the one thing they were not good at was subtlety.
Point A being...
“Happy Birthday!” The Sons of Calydon exclaimed as the lights turned on and confetti sprinkled across the room. Standing in the doorway was the man of the hour, with not a single hint of surprise on his face, with Big Daddy chuckling behind him.
The Sons of Calydon surrounded him, mostly complaining of his lack of a reaction (Caesar, Billy and Burnice). You meanwhile sat lazily by the lights since it was your job turning it on when the pair stepped through.
You snickered under your breath, you already told them they weren't being subtle to what they were planning, but they were convinced Lighter would be caught off guard. Guess they were majorly disappointed.
The party dragged on as the Sons of Calydon adorned cheap party hats and convinced Lighter to blow out the candles, you volunteered yourself to take the pictures. Snapping every second to savor the moment.
Everyone settled down to eat, with Burnice handing out the Nitro-Fuel. You have no doubt everyone will be drunk well into the night.
You huffed out a sigh as Billy animatedly talked about one thing or another as you slowly drank from your cup of Nitro-Fuel. Everyone was either becoming drunk or tipsy, someone must've turned up the music to some popular hip song as everyone shouted over the music.
The drink brought the warmth to fight off the chill of the night, so you excused yourself to escape the noise.
You walked out of the building that held the new guy's birthday party. Now that you can actually hear your own thoughts and don't have anyone drunkenly screaming into your ear, You weren't as drunk as you thought you'd be.
So you weren't surprised to see the new guy leaning against his bike, far away from his own party.
You had half the mind to just walk away, leave the guy alone and walk off into the night. Maybe go back to your research and organize.
But you thought back to what Caesar said. You have been living together for a while now, and you haven't had the slightest clue who Lighter actually was. You didn't really try, the guy looked like he wanted to be left alone.
Just as you were about to turn away from his silhouette and back to your research, you hesitated. You turned back to him.
It wasn't fair to assume, friendship was a two way street after all.
You sighed to yourself, before stuffing your hands into your pockets, psyching yourself up to talk to the guy.
“You're not at your party.” You started as the new guy turned to you. You cringed to yourself at the blunt statement, you tried to make up for it as you approached him, “The others really wanted to surprise you with a party.”
You stood a little aways from him, hands still in your pockets as Lighter observed you.
You hummed at the very eyes that were hidden behind shades almost all the time, now looking at you. You have to admit, the guy had pretty eyes.
You cleared your throat as embarrassment ran through you, okay where the hell did that come from?
“Just not in the mood I guess..” Lighter mumbled out as he looked away from you. You stared at him for a few seconds, noting the lack of shades and his hand fidgeting with the chain of dog tags he always carries around with him. You decided to walk slowly before stopping right in front of him.
The two of you shared a moment of silence, while it wasn't uncomfortable, it was unsure. Unsure how to start a conversation, unsure how to breach the subject. Your eyes continued to travel to Lighter and the dog tags clutched in his hands. You weren't stupid, you know what it meant.
Just as you were finding topics to bring up just so you can actually talk to the guy, Lighter beat you to it, “You've… been researching the Hollows for a while now right?” He asked so quietly, you had to strain your ears just to hear him. You looked at him with a question in mind, but decided not to ask it. “I have.” You answered.
“Any progress?” Lighter asked, you have no idea if he was genuinely curious or was asking for the sake of a conversation.
“Not… really…” You sighed to yourself, thinking back to the Old Capital and the lives lost. You closed your eyes to hide the grief and the regret that was surely present.
The silence was deafening between you two, you were already regretting talking to him as it dragged on. You puffed out an exhale, the Outer Ring’s night air was growing colder by the second.
“Have you ever lost anyone, Researcher?” Lighter softly asked. You looked back at him in surprise, not expecting for someone so guarded to ask such a vulnerable question.
But Lighter wasn't even looking at you, instead, his attention was back to his dog tags. Eye lashes kissing his skin as he continued to look down.
You bit your lip, thinking back to the screams of the innocent and the pleas of mercy. You closed your eyes as their scornful faces appeared in your mind.
“I did.” You answered plainly, observing the man who was deep in thought.
Another bout of silence before Lighter finally looked at you, eyes swimming with a question he was desperate to have answered. “Yet you still have that drive in you.”
You blinked at him, now that he wasn't focusing solely on the metal in his hands, you looked at his flushed cheeks and his slurred words. You felt the tension in your muscles relax as you softly looked at him.
“You still have that– determination. To do what you do, how the hell do you do it?” Lighter asked, voice not above a whisper. You haven't seen a man so broken down, and you didn't expect the man to be someone like Lighter. Who stood tall at the face of adversities, someone who faced the world and fought back.
You feel like you were looking into a mirror.
“I lost people.” You admitted, shifting to stand beside him as you looked up at the night sky. The moon was full tonight and the galaxy away from this planet was visible this far deep into the Outer Ring, no light or air pollution to hinder the sight.
“But, lingering on grief won't fix anything.” You felt Lighter's gaze stare intently at you, despite his apparent tipsiness, the guy still has his focus.
“I feel… guilty in a way I can't explain. And I want to fix that, but I've learned that feeling guilty will only hinder me from what's really important.” You continued. You have no idea why you were admitting this to the guy who you haven't even talked to one on one without the Sons of Calydon present. Was it the Nitro-Fuel? The tipsiness? The added frustration and stress? Or is it because Lighter understands?
You let out a quiet chuckle, amused by the absurdity of it all, but Lighter continued to look at you, with a hint of something in his gaze.
“I guess I've learned that, I don't need to just… grieve. I need to live because that's what they would have wanted, for me to live.” You said, emotions swimming in your gaze, but you haven't noticed his stare yet as you looked down.
“I mean, I've lost them, yes. But their loss isn't the end, I will always miss them. I will. But I know that, I can't just stay grieving forever, right?” You rambled, not noticing Lighter leaning further in your space.
You fell silent as you looked at the sand beneath your shoes, parting your lips as a sigh escapes you. But you felt no heavy weight in your chest, only a feeling as light as a feather. Were you so drunk that you rambled to the guy whom you don't know much about?
But you smiled nonetheless, the feeling freeing as a bird fluttered in your chest, you looked back at the night sky with its dark blues and grey clouds.
“So what is grief, if not love preservering?” You looked back at the man beside you, before falling silent at his focused gaze on you. He didn't look tipsy or drunk, he just looked… amazed.
A warmth crawled into your collar as you processed Lighter's gaze on you, you cleared your throat and looked away. Mentally reprimanding yourself from becoming so sidetracked that you rambled to Lighter.
Just as you tried to compose yourself, Lighter silently stared at you with his lips parting in surprise. Lighter thought for a moment, he looked at the dog tags in his hands, running his thumb through the luster before he smiled to himself.
“I guess it is love preserving, huh?” Lighter mumbled as he put the dog tags around his neck, hiding it within the folds of his red scarf and settling it on his chest.
You looked at him in surprise as the man stood to his full height.
You cleared your throat as Lighter turned his attention back to you.
“Are you going back to the party?” You asked, pointing with your eyes as you looked between Lighter and the old diner where the party was being held.
Lighter was silent as he looked between you and the party, with its loud music and probably drunk partygoers.
Lighter hummed as an idea popped in his head, “I was thinking of driving around.”
You tilted your head at him as he looked at you, his eyes were a pretty shade of green with a hint of red. What a unique eye color.
“Do you wanna… join me?” Lighter hesitantly offered, you blinked at him in surprise. This time, you observed the party in the background and then back at the man before you.
Go back to the noisy ass party and it's drunk party goers or take a ride with Lighter?
Well, Caesar did say to get to know the guy better.
But there was one problem, “I don't, uh, exactly have a bike, man.” You said pointedly.
Lighter seemed to pause in thought before he shrugged, “You can ride with me then. If you still want to, of course.”
You looked at the man with surprise as he pulled out his shades from his pocket to put it on. You were going to miss that green.
You silently reprimanded yourself for that line of thought, you weren't that drunk, right? You don't feel drunk or even tipsy, so where the hell did these sudden thoughts come from?
“Well, if you don't mind.” You tried to feign an air of nonchalance, but ultimately failed as the once stoic man in front of you let out a small chuckle, “I'll make sure to take care of you, Researcher.”
#zenless zone zero#lighter lorenz x reader#lighter x reader#zzz lighter#lighter zzz x reader#zenless zone zero x reader#hbd to my baby#his bday art has me in a chokehold
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skincare with keigo bc I'm never not soft for him and want to take care of him forever. happy birthday !!!!!!!!
gn!reader, no physical descriptions, lots and lots and lots of fluff. he is my baby. also I don't have a real skincare routine, so I'm apologizing in advance for how lackluster it may seem. this is in the pre-moving in together stage of your relationship, but not too early on either, if it matters to you!
keigo watches you curiously through the doorway that leads to the master bathroom as he sits on your bed cross-legged. he doesn't want to disrupt whatever it is you're doing (you seem very focused), but he's extremely interested in what you're putting on your face.
he thinks you look stunning with the fluffy animal headband on and some shorts paired with one of his old shirts. he thinks he could look at you like this forever, actually.
he watches you smile slightly and lean over the counter to get closer to the mirror. "I can feel you staring at me, you know."
his heart flutters and he tries to ignore how hot his face feels.
you stand up straight again and turn your face towards him, beckoning him over with a wave of your hand. as if he's been waiting for you to do just that, he gets up and saunters into the bathroom.
"so... what exactly is all this?" he asks, settling behind you with his arms around your waist, inspecting the different bottles and containers.
"they're skincare products. see?" you hold up one of the tubes for him to read, going back to spreading the cream over your skin.
"hydrating... morning and night use... huh."
you pick up on the curiosity in his voice and look at him through the mirror. “do you want to try my skincare routine for yourself, keigo?”
he hesitates and you give him a moment to decide, though you have a feeling you know what he’s going to say. eventually keigo does nod and you peck him on the cheek. “I’ll get you a headband, just a second.”
moments later you're sitting on the counter, shoving a white headband with panda ears over his head. he stares at himself in the mirror, watching you adjust it so his hair is pushed back from his forehead.
"you're so cute," you murmur, smiling at him and resisting the urge to press kisses all over his face. "okay, brush your teeth before we start. I've heard doing it after messes things up."
"really?" he sound skeptical.
you shrug. "I dunno if there's any merit to it but I've seen enough people mention it, so I just do it this way now."
he nods and reaches behind you to grab the red toothbrush you keep for him whenever he sleeps over. you sneak a kiss against the corner of his mouth when he's close enough and it makes him grin.
once he's done brushing his teeth, he steps away to spit into the sink and wipe his mouth before returning between your legs. "alright, what's first?"
you grab a tall tube and present it to him the same way he's seen people online do it in those viral review videos. "face wash. it helps get all the dirt and grime out, and it's good for sensitive skin."
you wet your hands in the sink and raise them to his face to dampen it. "this one suggests using it on slightly wet skin for better results."
he lets you pat him until you're satisfied, and he watches as you put some of the gel on your hands. "close your eyes."
you don't need to tell him twice.
keigo happily lets you massage the product into his face and you giggle a bit when he leans into it. "does it feel nice?"
he nods a bit. "so nice."
"alright, it's foamy now, you can wash it off."
he blinks, returning to reality, and does what you say. once all the face wash is gone, you tap a towel against him, careful not to rub. "okay, would you say your skin feels dry, oily or a combination of both most of the time?"
he thinks about how his skin can get a bit itchy and wind burnt from all the flying he does while on patrol. "very dry."
you nod and grab the tin he was looking at earlier. "this helps with that."
you scoop a bit onto your index finger and smooth it over his cheeks, forehead and temples. "there," you smile softly and cup his face in your palms. "now you'll be even softer, which I honestly didn't think was possible, but here we are." he's certain his pupils are heart-shaped at this point. your entire aura is tinted pink and red and there's cartoon hearts bubbling up around you. he wonders if you have a secret second quirk he doesn't know about or if the mind really is as powerful as they say.
he doesn't know how exactly to filter the intense emotions running through him as you continue to dote on him, so they just well up inside of him until he can't stop the quick and sap-filled "I love you so much," from bubbling out of his mouth.
you pause a little at how... thankful he sounds. you know that he isn't used to being pampered- not that he's ever explicitly stated that, you just kind of put two and two together based on his career and what he's told you of his past- but you hadn't realized how much it would affect him.
so you smile at him and tilt his face down to kiss his head, careful not to get any product on your lips. you return the sentiment, happy to be of service to him for once, and ignore the way your insides are turning to goop at his expression.
you'll have to dote on him more often. not only because you want to see him like this more often, but because you want- no, need to make up for all those years he must have felt discarded and used and overworked... he handles it well. he's accepted his duty and thrives in his field. you know he does, otherwise he would have snapped long before he met you, but... it hurts to realize that something as simple as skincare is enough to toss him into unknown territory.
once you're done with the moisturizer, you slip the panda headband off of him and blink away the tears threatening to fall. he's still wearing that appreciative expression, heart eyes and all, so you pull him close and wrap your arms around his shoulders.
"I love you more than you will ever know, keigo," you mumble into his neck. "don't ever doubt that, okay?"
his arms find their way around your waist and you feel him nod against your head. you reveal your face to him and press your forehead against his, gently nudging noses.
comfortable silence lingers for a bit before he whispers "you smell good."
you snort and pull back. "it's the moisturizer, it's pear scented. do you want to head to bed now? the counter is cold."
he nods again and picks you up, encouraging you to wrap your legs around him despite the fact that the distance from the washroom to your bed is only less than twenty steps.
as soon as you're both under the covers and he expels one of his feathers to turn the light off, you beckon him over to lay on your chest.
you tangle your fingers in his hair, gently massaging his scalp and tailing down to scratch the nape of his neck. he lets out a content sigh and he presses soft, sleepy kisses to any bare skin he can find without moving too much. you almost laugh at how quickly you're able to get him relaxed.
you know you'll miss his weight on your body by time you wake up- he'll be long gone for an early morning patrol. even so, at least you'll be comforted with the knowledge that he was able to get a good night's sleep.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I love him :(
#hawks x reader#hawks x reader fluff#hawks fluff#takami keigo x reader#takami keigo x reader fluff#bnha x reader#mha x reader#bnha x reader fluff
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Taking Care of You
A/N: Written for @the-slumberparty's December Daze Challenge.
Prompt: hot chocolate/apple cider/tea and a nice book
Warnings: Implied smut, Language, Pregnancy. Please let me know if I'm missing any!
Series Masterlist
You were sitting on the couch, wrapped up in a blanket, alternating between watching the snow fall and reading your book while drinking cider made from the apples you and Steve had picked earlier in the year. Back before you knew you were pregnant.
Your smile widens at the memory of Steve trying to tell you about it. That it was the reason he'd been in such a territorial, protective mood. You weren't upset with him but you did ask about a pregnancy test or two to confirm. He understood and not only got you the pregnancy tests but also got you a doctor appointment to confirm. Sure enough, you were about a month along then.
Since then Steve has been going into overdrive to make sure you and the baby are safe and comfortable. Emphasis on the comfortable. You never thought you'd go for the kind of man that takes care of almost literally everything for you, but Steve might be changing your mind on that. He somehow manages to be around all the time without feeling suffocating. Even when you go into town together and he's in full on guard mode. If anything, his caring, protective side just makes your hormones go even more out of control.
As if on cue, Steve comes into the living room from his workshop. He's been working on a handmade crib for the little one, insisting he wants the pup to be surrounded by familial scents. He must have worked up a sweat because his shirt is off and you lick your lips at his exposed torso. You gently squeeze your thighs together and he gives you a knowing look.
"Does my girl need some attention?" he almost growls.
"Please, Steve," you whine.
"Tell me what you need, Doll."
"I need you to fuck me, Steve," you whimper. "I need you to fill my pussy with your cock, please!"
Steve's pupils are blown as he starts unwrapping you from your blankets. "It'll cost you, you know."
"What's the price?" you moan. The blankets are off and his hands are pushing down your sweatpants.
"First I get to eat your pussy like it's my last meal."
A shiver runs down your spine as you whimper, "yes, please."
You're woken up by the sound of Steve's voice. You feel a slight pressure on your stomach and, after blinking a few times, you realize Steve is talking to the small bump created by the baby.
"I have no idea what I'm doing," he confesses to the baby bump. "But I promise I'll do whatever it takes to make sure you and your mama are safe and happy." He pauses for a few moments. "That being said, we gotta have a talk about your eating habits. I get that you want a lot of protein but you need to let Mama eat some vegetables. You both need the nutrients. It can't be steak, pork chops, and ham all the time. Though you do seem to accept soups and stir fry. Maybe Mama can teach me how to make those so she can rest some more. Don't think I haven't noticed how tired she's gotten. Seriously, you gotta let her eat some veggies."
His one-sided conversation is interrupted by your giggles.
"Excuse you," he playfully chides, "I'm having a conversation here."
"You're talking to my belly," you counter.
"I'm talking to our baby, thank you."
You both smile softly when he says that. You gesture for him to move in close for a kiss and he acquiesces.
"And I know you're going to be a great dad," you assure him, making his cheeks turn pink.
"We won't know for certain until the baby is here."
"Trust me," you hug him. "You're already working hard to make sure this baby has a great start in life. You've even been reaching out to other werewolves, something you've never done before, just to ask about things for me and the baby. You swallowed your pride for us. That's no small endeavor."
Steve nuzzles his beard against your neck. "Thank you for giving me a much better, richer life than I ever thought I'd get."
"My pleasure, Steve."
Series Masterlist
Tagging: @alicedopey; @darsynia; @delicatebarness; @icefrozendeadlyqueen; @irishhappiness; @lokislady82; @ronearoundblindly; @thiquefunlover63
#navy and roo's sleepover#werewolf!steve rogers#steve rogers x reader#werewolf au#steve rogers x female!reader#werewolf!steve rogers x reader#steve rogers x pregnant!reader
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Arcane Season 2
Lately, I've seen a lot of content creators and people online reacting and talking about Arcane season 2 in a negative way, to the point where they say that the season was trash. And honestly it makes me mad. If the ending of the story, or the story itself wasn't your cup of tea, is okay. Media enjoyment and appreciation is subjective, however, we can all be objective when it comes to the actual content of said media...and that is what has me so disappointed on their takes, because their reviews (that I came across with) are flat out lacked on media literacy and did not entirely understand the source material they were reviewing.
Let's start with the character arcs...in my honest opinion. THEY WERE GOOD. ALL OF THEM. I feel like a lot of people are exaggerating when it came to the arcs (especially Vi, Jinx and Caitlyn's) saying that they were not developed enough like in the first season, but I disagree. Most of their arcs for season 2 were HEAVLY hinted and foreshadowed in season 1, mostly Jinx's and Cait's.
One of the arc that gets more hate is Vi's, and is because of the s3x scene of season 2 episode 8 and the finale of season 2 episode 9, and overall season 1. As well as her forgiveness towards Caitlyn and how she acted selfishly in that episode. However, they don't take into account 2 things: 1. Vi is heartbroken (for what it feels the 30th time in both seasons) because Jinx/Powder tears and rejects Vi's help and unconditional love (Vi's fatal flaw is not knowing when to drop the towel, and establishing boundaries for herself, believe me, I learned that THE HARD WAY ) .
2. Vi and Caitlyn might not have enough time to talk about their feelings as deeply as they would've liked (a literal WAR is coming) so, they did it in the most raw and truthful form of love language, touch and eyes. No words, they weren't needed either.
Don't blame her for doing what it felt right in the moment, also let's be real here. Jinx gave her consent, and decided to leave Vi (Vi doesn't know the context, we do), for her sibling's benefit and love for her, because it hurts to Jinx that Vi is not taking care of herself and not pursuing what she truly wants, which is Caitlyn.
Was it in the worst moment of Jinx deteriorating mind? Yes. Was it out of place?...Maybe. But, was it necessary for the plot? OBVIOUSLY.
The s3x scene holds and magnifies the arcs of the couple and their vulnerability (Vi taking the leap and show her feelings, and Caitlyn responding and being truthful of hers). There are videos that explain the importance and the weight that holds in the arcs of Caitlyn and Violet, way in depth and detailed. They all point out the symbols and meanings of their gestures, which are wonderful. And ties together their bond and their strengths. As a younger sibling, strangely enough, I connect with Vi more than Jinx. That is because of the parental and family expectations that they have on me. I had to take a role of being the caretaker since "I'm more mentally stable". So I understand why Vi is the way she is.
Therefore, I understand and relate to Vi wanting to be selfish for once, without feeling guilty about it later. Not having regrets.
I recently rewatched both seasons and I have to say, it all played out perfectly, including the finale. And it payed off to all the build up in season 1, because of the foreshadows and plot devices used in both seasons to tell the story. The plot points and story arcs were very good, especially since they all connected to the main theme, which is forgiveness. Where do you draw the line in where there is nothing left to forgive or how far are you willing to do so. The plots truly showcased what is Arcane (narratively and character) and how does storytelling (mostly subtext, non-verbal and visual ) actually work. The way the writers handled it was MAGNIFICENT and TRAGIC. Which serves right for the story they conveyed in the series.
I think, one of the reasons that this season was received poorly (compared to season 1) is due to the already constructed ending and story lines that we might have thought of. Which might have more things or less than the main series but it was something to cling on before the premiere of the last season. And because of it, they judge it extremely and harshly without actually taking into account what the story was actually about. Would it have benefited of more episodes? No. Would it have benefited of more runtime? in some things, yes but at the same time, i don't mind it and I believe that it is good. Would it have been better if there was another season to wrap up the story? Definitely not. That is due to the story being pretty much a solid story with a few strong undertones that have unfolded before its finale. I LOVE Arcane, and I would watch it again and again (both seasons). I think, it is one of the biggest series of all time and also the most compelling one in modern media). This final season brought me to tears and this hollow feeling in my chest yet satisfied by the way it ended the main journey of Runeterra, and opened to many more.
Also controversial opinion, but I like season 2 a lot more than season 1. And that is because, I love the development of it (the show of progression and how it embraces the themes showed on the series)
BTW, THE MUSIC SLAPS. BEST OST HANDS DOWN MIC DROP!!!!!!
(P.S. As an english literature major, I might have more insight on this but don't be afraid to disagree/agree in the comments)
I want to know how y'all felt and if you want to ask me something or debate this, you're free to do so. I hope I can create a save space for all types of convos about this show.
love,
~lovely References:
https://youtu.be/dRvgb_CB9Ss?si=rQGmpPAYL5XrDR1u https://youtu.be/LZ6szm2fmB4?si=k7l-OuE018PpctjM https://youtu.be/0nhTS9-P7eQ?si=MkMntcyQZTHPzgYZ https://youtu.be/l0-We7fyCaQ?si=aP-fhcWxSspphBT-https://youtu.be/sIJEQjMqiNA?si=xF8rt77LKAG0Kpp6 https://youtu.be/NtDGwZxQyio?si=ZTKq1E2VetcXkyis https://youtu.be/30zVFfziBuk?si=AQpE6cntutdQvBfz https://youtu.be/9Lro6HmaWiA?si=PxPq4U8s138nlHw4. https://youtu.be/W3cNewkYB8o?si=LsyGnzC3iaMpr7K1 https://youtu.be/nD9cNowdBQg?si=jxqwX1tmuunnZpHi
#arcane#vi#caitlyn kiramman#jinx#arcane s2 spoilers#arcane season 2#arcane jayce#caitvi#caitlyn arcane
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Ambush Simulation scenario where Fuyumi and Shouto both get sick. Because if they get sick, between Touya being immunocompromised and Natsuo not living at home, Endeavor has to be the one to deal with them.
Touya: *calling from Compress' house* I don't know what to tell you, Dad. You can either make food, order food, or text Natsuo. Your call.
Endeavor: Interesting how your sister is so diligent in taking care of you during your illnesses, and yet--
Touya: Don't you fuckin' gaslight me into coming home. You know damn well if I catch whatever those two have, it might just kill me. Unless that's the goal.
Endeavor: Don't be dramatic. It's just a cold.
Touya: Yeah...the last time I had 'just a cold,' I ended up in the ER two days later with bronchitis. I won the health crisis bingo card that week.
Endeavor: Oh really, what else was on this bingo card of yours?
Touya: Bronchitis, influenza, pneumonia--
Endeavor: That doesn't start with an N.
Touya: --pneumonia, gangrene, and a nasty oropharynx infection.
Endeavor: When the hell did you have gangrene?
Touya: Turns out, that's why I needed my gallbladder removed when I was ten and you totally forgot about that, didn't you? Hey, you think the freaks who put me back together gave me a new one?
Endeavor: Goodbye, Touya.
...
The further adventures that show Touya didn't need to become a villain to torment his father. He just needed to be a pain in the ass and enjoy the fireworks. I picture him gleefully kicking his heels through that entire convo.
#my hero academia#dabi#touya todoroki#endeavor#ambush simulation#alternate universe#boku no hero academia#bnha#mha#todoroki family#fuyumi todoroki#natsuo todoroki#shouto todoroki
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Just a rant about some things I have been seeing for a while now on some videos.
Basically the videos I'm referring to usually have something to with LGBTQ+ (Mostly TQ+) and then when I go to the comments I see something like this,
'I'm a gay/bi/lesbian and I don't really care about the TQ+ side and because of (random thing that really isn't an issue like pronouns) this is why the LGB is divorcing the TQ+ side day by day."
It really just annoys me how people can be acting like this to their own community. They make it sound as the TQ+ is the 'louder minority' as so they put it they are less normal than them the other people that a part of this community.
It really just annoys me, with the way they say 'The LGB side should divorce the TQ+ side because they're weird and making us look even stranger than we already are!' Like buddy, I have actually seen those stuff twice, one when I was a homophobe and the second one when I realized I was multigender and cupiromantic/demisexual.
And let me honest, my first reaction to those comments the first time were literally, 'Oh hush, you all still weird as fuck with or without the TQ+". Because seriously, no bigot sees any difference between the casual gay person and trans person. All still abominations in their eyes, talking from my point of view before I stopped being homophobic.
Plus, they are all meant to correlate?? Like you can be trans masc and be gay. You can be a nonbinary lesbian. So people who say the stuff genuinely confused me as I myself is a gay multigender who also so happens to be trans.
It really just hurts how some people don't understand we need to stick together.
yeah i've literally never understood this logic either ??? thanks for coming to point that out, i've been thinking about this a lot lately. like when i see "lgb without the t" my brain just goes ??? because it just makes literally no sense
like why on earth do some people think the queer community "belongs" to cis perisex lesbians, gays and (sometimes, not always) biexuals, and that they're just "lending space" to trans people, intersex people, other queer people, questioning people and so on. i've literallly never understood the logic that cis perisex gays, lesbians and bisexuals are the "real" community, and then everyone else is toxic weirdos trying to "invade" their community. where did they get this from, because it's not historically accurate at all
it's disturbing that this is about controlling the queer community to folks who say "lgb witout the t(q+)". nobody should be in control of the community. we all share it together. equally
trans people have been fighting for queer rights alongside cis queers since the beginning. genderqueer, gnc, genderfluid, agender, multigender and intersex queers have been standing right beside cis queers at marches and rallies. trans people have been writing about homophobia, lesbophobia, biphobia and intersexism alongside the cis queers in modern queer history. why do people think they need to erase that? why would you erase progress for the sake of being petty??
its wild as hell that people genuinely think like this, i agree, it's one of the most unhinged takes i've seen in the longest time. like imagine if us trannies said "gbtqi+ without the L" literally all hell would break loose. tumblr's servers would crash from the monstrous level of backlash people would be facing. you'd be shot dead in the water. but for some reason, it's perfectly okay when you slice off a huge, very important chunk of the community because some people are uncomfy with not being able to tell what genitals a stranger has. it's so petty
i hope people who think this way get past it soon. it's dumb. like you said, queerphobes see us all as gross nasty freaks. it doesn't matter what you identify as. the thing nobody fails to realize:
the queerphobe can't tell what you actually identify as.
let that sink in.
they are guessing. they can't read your mind. even if your pin says "I'm a genderfluid trans neutral butch!" that does not mean a queerphobe knows what the fuck that means. queerphobes see: dyke, faggot, tranny: one of them queers. that's all they see. that's it. they don't know what anything else is. it's not trans' peoples faults that they see us as dykes and faggots, so how is it trans people's faults that other people get slurs hurled at them? it's not. they hate you for being queer. that's. it.
blaming trans people for other queer people's oppression will never make sense. thanks for stopping by! take care. this shit pisses me off too, i'm glad it's not just me
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day on the green
𖤐 bandom blog: @princess-lvcifer 𖤐 english ao3 𖤐 spanish ao3 𖤐 edits 𖤐 kofi 𖤐 𝄞 𖤐
ship: eddie munson x f!reader
summary: you travel with your best friend through the country to go to a metal festival in San Francisco with him
a/n: lots of metallica references as usual / i wrote this in summer 2022 / english isn't my first language, sorry if something's weird expressed
cw: fluff, best friends to lovers, sexual and romantic tension, sexual humor, affectionate insults
word count: 12'1k
"______, Eddie's calling," said her mother, entering her room without knocking or asking permission. She was listening to Metallica at full volume and knew she probably wasn't going to hear her.
"I'm coming," she said dropping the magazine she was reading, leaving it at the foot of his bed and getting up from it to go downstairs to where the house phone was. "Hey, what's up?" She wanted to hold back the urge to smile like the lovesick fool she was, since her mother was circling the house like a shark, and she didn't want her to know she liked him, not because she was ashamed of him or because her mother thought he was a bad influence — on the contrary, she and Eddie got along well, she didn't see him as a bad guy, but who would want her mother to know which boy she liked? And on top of that he was a close friend who often went to her house.
"Are you at home?" he asked nervously.
"Can't you see I am, asshole?" She asked now. "What's wrong?"
"Okay, don't move from there, I'm on my way," he said, and hung up.
"You fucking asshole," she whispered to herself, she hated being left wondering, she was worried, but knowing Eddie it wouldn't be serious. The most serious thing that could happen was that he'd get caught smoking or selling weed.
She didn't hear Eddie park his van in front of her house because her music was on full blast, but if it wasn't for that, she would have heard him. She had good hearing and recognised the noise made by the engines of his loved ones' cars. She could also recognise the sound of keys or footsteps as they walked.
What she did hear was the doorbell of the house in the distance. She got out of bed and turned the music down, it was obvious that Eddie was there to tell her something, although she had no idea what, but she'd better be able to hear it loud and clear, she'd listen to her favourite songs loud and clear at any other time.
The door to her room was open, so he didn't ask permission to enter. He was practically at his houss, but he did leave it ajar when he entered.
"What is it?" She asked indignantly as she sat cross-legged on her bed. "You've got me fucking intrigued!"
"Boom," he said, raising his right hand, in which he held a pamphlet. She could clearly see names of rock and metal bands she knew: Scorpions, Ratt, Y&T, Metallica, Rising Force, Victory.... Though his eyes went to her favourite band, Metallica, hardly paying attention to the others, as she didn't care that much about them.
Eddie took off his shoes and sat down on her bed, facing her, also with his legs crossed.
"It's this year's Day on the Green," he said, handing her the sheet, "Saturday 31 August. The next day it's Wham! and some other pop bands I obviously don't want to see. I've always wanted to go. We have to go, I won't take no for an answer."
"18'50$... It's expensive, and in Oakland! How are we going to get there, if we go at all?"
"But it's worth the price! And we can go by bus, or by plane, or in my caravan... Yeah, I think my caravan would be better. Think about it, you and me, travelling around the country in a caravan, listening to our favourite songs and shouting them out, and then listening to them played live by their creators and together with more fans..." He couldn't fit the smile on his face and his eyes were shining, it was adorable when he looked so excited, you could tell he liked what he was talking about. "It's a great plan, you can't say no," he said pointing his right hand with his index finger.
It was true, it was a great plan and she couldn't say no to him. And she really wanted to live such a unique experience with him, and alone, but the money issue put her off, and she didn't know what her mother would say about it.
"And on top of that, it's the summer holidays, you can't give me the excuse of school."
"Yes, but the money and my mother..."
"Don't worry about the money, you know..." He whispered.
Yes, it was true, he was loaded from selling weed, but it was bad for her to accept that he paid her entrance fee and everything, and that he drove and paid for the petrol.
"Even though you're failing all your science subjects, you're a good girl, I'm sure she'll let you have a whim like that. And I'm sure she doesn't think too badly of me, does she?"
"I hope so... But before we say anything, we should organise it a bit, so that she sees that we're not going on a wild adventure, that we're organised, and get her in a good mood."
"I see the logic of it, but it has to be as soon as possible, tickets may fly."
"Then let's get down to work. We must go to the library to consult maps and their routes."
That's what they did. They worked out how long the trip would take to get there and back, when they would have to leave Hawkins and when they would be back, motels to spend the night in, gas stations, how much money each of them would have to take with them to pay for expenses, how much the whole trip would cost, and a little emotional and psychological blackmail to use on _______'s mother if needed.
The next day, she let her mother know that Eddie would be going to dinner in the evening and that they wanted to tell her something important. The second she thought they wanted to tell her that they had been together for a long time or even worse, like a pregnancy, but she cleared her worries by telling her it was nothing of the sort.
"I want you here at six o'clock sharp. Get ready," she told him as she got out of Eddie's caravan in front of her house. Her house was between the school and his house, so he was her taxi driver.
"I know, I know."
"Isn't he coming in yet?" asked her mother when she saw her walk in the front door alone.
"No, he's going home to get ready," she said as she made her way to the stairs and took her backpack off her shoulders, "or did you want him to get ready here?"
"What should I make him for dinner?"
"Whatever you want, he'll eat it all pleased," she said on the first floor.
Hours passed and the doorbell rang. It was time. Luckily, he had been on time. For what he wanted to do, he was, but not for his early morning classes at school.
Eddie wasn't that uncomfortable, because he already knew the mother of his best and only female friend, but she had told him that her mother saw him as a possible boyfriend, so he knew what was going through her mind when she saw him with her daughter (the same thing happened with some people at school), and that made him ashamed, because on top of that, at least on his part, he did feel something for _______, something more than friendship.
And well, besides, it was the first time he had dinner and spent so much time with her mother, and of course, there was also the main plan, the mission they had to achieve: to convince her to let her go with him on a trip around the country and go to that metal festival. Technically she didn't need her permission, since she was already 18, but being a woman and still living under her roof, for things like that it was better to have her approval.
"Well, what is it that you wanted to tell me? Intrigue kills me," said her mother, as the three of them sat down at the table.
"Like mother, like daughter," he thought.
"Well, mom, as you know, I love metal, and so does he. It's a music that has helped me a lot in many ways for a long time, and so has Eddie, even though we've known each other for half a year. There's going to be a festival in Oakland on Saturday the 31st of August and we'd really like to go. We've thought about going in his caravan, both of us driving every couple of hours. Also, because of the proximity, we'd like to visit San Francisco and Los Angeles for at least a day, and we'd come back through the south, through the Bible Belt. He has insisted on paying for everything but I have told him no, I could pull from my savings or start working a bit. We've also looked at routes and motels to sleep in, and if anything should happen to the car Eddie is a good mechanic and has all the necessary equipment. I would call you every time we stopped at a place with a phone box. And I think I deserve to go to the festival, plus it's something that would make me very happy and travelling around the country in a car would be an experience..."
"And of course I would look after her in every way, you don't have to worry about anything," he said as seriously as she did.
"Of course, of course," she pointed her index finger at him, giving him a quick glance and a quick nod.
She looked at each of them and a smirk appeared on her face. They were both already fearing the worst.
"All this to ask me to take you on a trip and go to a concert?" she asked incredulously while holding back her laughter.
"...Yes?"
"For God's sake, you don't need to worry so much, you're both old enough to ask my permission. Besides, I can't wait for you to see the world and get wise," she said looking only at her daughter.
"So, ma'am, does that mean yes?" asked Eddie.
"Of course it does," she replied, and they both looked at each other smiling from ear to ear and high-fived.
She looked at them tenderly. It was obvious to her that they were both in love with each other.
Time passed ridiculously slowly.
During the months of waiting before the festival began, Eddie slightly increased the prices of the weed he sold, and started giving private guitar lessons to kids in town to earn a little extra and to disguise where he was getting the money to afford the trip. Meanwhile, she started giving drawing, English and Spanish classes to other kids.
On the first day of May Live Aid was announced, but despite being closer than Oakland, as it would be held in Philadelphia and would be no more than a day's drive (not counting the return trip), it was too expensive. 35$ each ticket. The price was understandable, as the event was going to be an unprecedented spectacle, where many people would be working for a good cause, but they already had enough expenses with what the Day on the Green tickets cost and the trip they would be making. Besides, even if they didn't go to the festival, raising so much money in such a short time was quite difficult, as Live Aid would be on 13th July, and tickets flew quickly, and rightly so, seeing the list of artists who were going to attend to help the cause.
Anyway, they watched Live Aid together on TV and that made them want to go to Day on the Green even more.
And finally the day came for them to go on the trip. She'd be lying if she said she wasn't climbing the walls like Spiderman herself because she was so nervous. She had never left Indiana, she had never made such a long trip, both in terms of distance and days, and she had never been separated from her mother for such a long time. But at least she was going to experience all that with her best friend and the boy she was in love with.
She had been ready since the day before and had gone through her luggage four times, and was about to do it for the fifth time, when a clack sounded outside her house. It was him, no doubt about it. She almost had a heart attack. It was time to go.
She left the house with the luggage and she and her mother pretended to put the things in the caravan, but he got off them and insisted on doing it himself.
As it was almost the end of August, and it was so hot, he was wearing no shirt and shorts. Both young friends were embarrassed for her mother to see him like that, but it was an understandable outfit because of the heat.
She hugged her mother goodbye and told her that she loved her very much. As the mother she was, she could feel her nervousness.
"Don't worry about anything, silly, you'll have a great time, you'll see," her mother whispered in her ear as they hugged.
"I know, but..."
"Before you go, I have to take a picture of you!" said her mother as they parted, "Come on, get together."
Eddie put his arm around ______'s shoulders and pulled her close to him, resting his head on hers, and she posed, making a peace sign with one of her hands. He made a devil sign with his free hand.
Her mother took the camera off her neck and handed it to her, they got into the car, both waved goodbye to her mother and Eddie drove off.
"I CAN'T WAIT!" he shouted.
"Same," she said, laughing a little nervously.
"Well, it doesn't look like it from you," he said, looking at her strangely, "what's wrong?"
"It's nerves, don't worry."
"Nerves about what?"
"To make such a trip, to be so far away from my home and my mother for so long, my comfort zone."
"I mean, it would fuck me up at this point, but if you don't want to go, there's still time for me to turn back..."
"What the fuck are you talking about?! No way, of course I want to go on the trip and to the festival, and I've got you on top of that. I wouldn't do this madness with just anyone."
"Do you consider going on a trip and to a festival a crazy thing?" he asked with a mocking smile.
"No, but yes, if it's that far away..."
"As long as you don't tell me to turn around when we're in Nebraska or something like that, it's all right," he said jokingly.
"You know I won't."
On the way they listened and sang along to the cassettes he had, and she brought her own too, so they wouldn't always be alone listening to his.
It was around lunchtime and Eddie had already been driving for a couple of hours, so they stopped to rest and eat.
"Wait, I have to put sunscreen on again," she said before getting back in the car. She had just finished talking to her mother on the phone. She had little to say to her, evidently.
"Really? That's a scam, it's not necessary."
"You're telling me you've been driving around shirtless in the sun for hours without sunscreen?"
"Of course I am."
"You're going to burn, you idiot!"
"No way, you exaggerator."
"Put it," she said, offering the bottle of sunscreen.
"No," she said with disgust.
She poured cream into her free hand, moved closer to him and directed her cream-filled hand to his collarbone, rubbing her hand over it, and trying not to look at his tattooed chest or his tablet, making a superhuman effort not to let her eyes wander to those areas of his body. That took him by surprise, but he kept still and quiet, accepting the gesture.
"Dampen down a little," she asked as she rubbed cream back into her hand, looking up, meeting his eyes. "Do you see how necessary this is?" She asked as she creamed his left cheek, inches from each other. "You're already red."
He was sure he wasn't red from the sun, but he shut up.
"Turn around," she asked again, and he again obeyed.
For a second she stared at his back. She thought is was beautiful and couldn't believe she was about to run hee hands over it. She pushed his hair forward with her little finger so as not to get even a little cream in it.
"Don't you want to put your hair in a high ponytail or a bun?" She asked as she ran her hand down his back. "You'd be cooler."
"I look ridiculous."
"I'm sure you wouldn't. Besides, what difference does it make if I see you like that?"
"A lot," he thought, "you're the only person whose opinion really matters to me."
When he noticed she was done, he turned and she offered him the bottle of sunscreen again. His arms, legs and torso remained. It was understandable, she wasn't going to rub it all over him, he was too old to follow and it would be very uncomfortable in many ways, especially touching his torso, although they both wanted to.
When he finished applying the cream, he gave her back the pot and hugged her tightly.
"You idiot, you're going to stain me and you're sweaty! Ugh!" and he laughed wickedly.
"Do you want me to help you lie on your back?" he asked as he let her out of his grip.
She was wearing shorts and a crop top.
"Okay," she said as she turned around. She didn't need to, she could do it on her own, but she wasn't going to refuse help, especially if it was about him touching her.
Eddie put cream on his right hand and directed his hand to her back. He was nervous, more so than he had been before, when she was creaming him. He didn't know how to touch her, but he knew he had to act normal, so he rubbed his hand across the uncovered part of her back with the mission to get the sticky cream off his hand as quickly as possible. He tried not to look too closely at her back, and his fingertips ended up inside her crop top, unintentionally brushing her bra for a second. Then he slid his hand down her right side to remove what little cream he had left, stopping when he brushed against her trousers. She loved the feel of his hand right then, in that place, like that, even though it probably wasn't a big deal and she was making a movie in her head. Then he pushed her hair forward and decided to rub cream on her neck, massaging it lightly.
"Thank you," she said.
"You're welcome."
He got into the car, in the passenger seat, where she was before, and she quickly rubbed cream on her belly and legs, then sat in the driver's seat, where Eddie was before.
"Turn around and face the window," she said.
"For what?"
"You listen to me, okay?"
"Well... Okay."
She took off the extra hair tie she wore on her wrist as a spare in case she lost the one she was wearing and grabbed Eddie's hair, doing him a bun.
"Tell me, are you cooler right now?"
"Yes, but I'm sure I look ridiculous."
"You look gorgeous, as always," she said matter-of-factly, as she settled everything in the car so she could start driving.
After a few more hours they stopped again to stretch their legs and change drivers, had dinner at a fast food place and finally ended up at a motel, almost on the outskirts of the state.
When they entered the room they saw that there was only one bed.
"I'll go and ask for a room with two beds," he said, turning away.
"Eddie, it's night, and you're exhausted," she stopped him, taking him by the arm. "Come in, come on," she said, nodding her head.
"You don't care?" he asked, referring to sharing a double bed.
"I don't give a shit," she was even excited, but of course she wasn't going to say that, and she couldn't know that he did too, but he didn't want to make her uncomfortable in any way, so that's why he offered asking for a room with two beds.
They arranged their things and the first thing they wanted to do was to take a shower, they were exhausted, sweaty and sticky from the sun cream.
"I'll shower first," they both said at the same time, standing in the middle of the small room after sorting their luggage and taking things out. "...You first," they both said again at the same time, and laughed at the synchronicity and telepathy they sometimes had.
"Rock, paper, scissors?" she asked.
"Come on," he said, leaning closer to her.
They both kept their dominant hands behind their backs and recited the chant of the game at the same time.
"...and... three!" They both pulled their hands behind their backs at the same time, making their hands and fingers make the shape of the object they had chosen in their minds. She drew paper and he drew scissors, but as soon as he saw that she was losing the game, he turned his hand from scissors to stone, and then put his arm around her shoulders, making her walk towards the bathroom.
"You win, you first," he said.
"Dude!" she said, annoyed but laughing.
"Shhh."
"Well okay, but at least let me get some panties and my pajamas, or do you want me to come out of the bathroom naked?"
"All right, all right," he said letting go of her and raising his arms in the air as if he was being mugged.
She grabbed her clothes and stepped into the shower. Meanwhile, he pulled on his pajamas (aka boxer shorts), turned on the TV that was there, looked for MTV and sat on the edge of the bed to watch it. He wanted to lie down on the bed, but he didn't want to stink up the bed with the stench of his sweat or stain it.
When she came out of the bathroom her hair was wet, she was wearing only panties and a baggy T-shirt, and clearly no bra.
"Your turn," she said as she made her way to the bed to lie down on the left side of it.
He got up from the edge of the bed and went into the bathroom, which was full of steam.
"Did you take a hot shower, you crazy woman?" he asked before closing the door to get undressed and get into the shower.
"Yes," she replied as if it was the most normal thing in the world for the month they were in.
"It's the middle of August."
"Do you think I don't know that?" she asked, holding back her laughter, and then he, still surprised, closed the door.
She flicked through the television herself, but ended up back on MTV, then picked up the phone on the bedside table and called her mother again to let her know where they were and that they were okay.
He came out of the bathroom shortly after, wearing only short but baggy black boxer shorts and still with drops of cold water sliding off him, mostly running down his tattooed chest and back from his wet hair.
"Anything interesting on TV?" he asked as he lay down next to her on the bed.
"No, but we should turn it off now anyway," she said, referring to the fact that they had to get up early the next morning to continue driving.
"Yeah," he said, getting out of bed.
He went to turn off the television and the light, then turned on the ceiling fan and opened the window, then took off all his jewellery and watch, and finally lay back down on the bed with her, on her side, resting her head on his right arm. She moved into the same position facing him, and he could see her silhouette perfectly thanks to the little light coming in from outside the motel. Her T-shirt rode up slightly, revealing her belly.
She moved closer and snuggled up to him, which he gladly accepted and wrapped his free, left arm around her.
"I still can't process all of this, if you told me about this when we became friends..." she said as she looked at her friend's tattooed chest.
"Yeah, I wouldn't believe it either," he said, stroking her arm with his thumb.
It was the 27th of July last year, in the morning. She drove to her nearest record shop before they opened first thing in the morning. There was a queue of metalheads waiting in line outside the door, and she assumed they were there for exactly the same thing she was: to buy Metallica's new album, Ride the Lighting. Last year, having just released their first album, Kill 'em all, she had fallen completely in love with them and their style of music, and couldn't miss out on having the new album the instant it was released. She walked past all the metalheads standing there, until someone called out to her, catching her attention.
"_______!"
There he was, standing like the others, impatiently waiting for the shop to open to get his record.
They both knew each other from high school, despite not being in the same year or classes, and not being from popular groups, they understood and respected each other.
"Are you coming to get the new Metallica album?" he asked.
"Yes," and a big smile broke out on Eddie's lips as he gestured for her to come with him, standing next to him in the queue. "Thank you," she said for being a sneak. The person behind him pouted but fortunately didn't protest.
"I didn't know you liked Metallica, let alone knew them," he said, smiling. It was always a pleasure to meet people with the same musical tastes, especially when your tastes were considered strange and living in a small town.
"I can't say the same," she said smiling sideways, "it's pretty obvious looking at you that you do know them and many more rock and metal bands."
During the little while they waited in line they talked about how they met Metallica, their favourite songs from Kill 'em all, their favourite band members and asked each other if they liked other bands.
They went inside and went straight to get their copies of Ride the Lighting to take home.
"I'd love to listen to it together," he said as they left the shop after paying for the records, "and know each other's opinion of the songs instantly."
"Yeah," she said as they walked to the car park.
"I'd invite you to my place, but since my uncle works nights he sleeps in the mornings, and I'm going to have to listen to it," he said, referring to the record, "with my headphones on..."
"It's all right," she said. She could invite him to her house, since her mother was working and she had the whole house to herself, but she had just met him formally, she wasn't going to just invite him to her house. "I have an idea."
"What's that?"
"As soon as we get home we'll listen to it and when we're done we'll call each other to talk about it, what do you think?"
"That's fine with me."
They exchanged phone numbers and got into their cars and headed home to listen to the album for the first time.
Two minutes after she finished listening to the album, the phone rang. She knew it was him.
"What do you think?" he asked expectantly.
"I'm in shock, man."
"In a good way or a bad way?"
"What do you think? Let's see."
"Good? Because come on, I loved it."
"Me too! Although I didn't like all the songs," she said with a wince as she ran her finger along the phone's curly cord.
"No? Really?!"
"Yes."
"Which ones didn't you like?"
"Fade to Black and The call of Ktulu or whatever the fuck it's called," she could hear a small chuckle on the other line.
"I don't think they're bad."
"No no, I'm not saying that, it's just that they're not my style, I need a lot more rhythm, apart from the fact that they're too long."
"Yeah, it's understandable. I do like them but they're not my favourites either."
"And which ones are?"
"I couldn't tell you, they're all very good..." he was thoughtful for a few seconds. "Maybe... My favourite is Creeping Death. The riff, the lyrics, James's voice... It's tremendous."
"I loved that one too! And For Whom the Bell Tolls. Ride the lighting too but not as much as those two. I need to listen to them on loop for hours, I swear, I loved them."
Who knew in that moment that that album would quickly become a gold album and that just over a year later they would hear them live with him on the other side of the country?
The next few days of the trip were pretty much the same as that day: driving for hours, changing drivers, putting on sun cream, stopping to eat and go to the toilet, calling her mother and his uncle, filling up with petrol, listening to their cassettes at full volume and singing loudly in the caravan, smoking tobacco, laughing, talking about silly things, taking pictures with the camera of _______, and taking showers and sleeping in motels.
It was Thursday night, and they were already in downtown Nevada, resting in the motel where they stayed that night. They were also in a room with only one bed, a double bed, but they didn't mind.
"I don't know if I'll be able to sleep tonight, I can't believe we'll be in Oakland by tomorrow. I could just keep driving right now," he said as they huddled together, and knowing him as well as she did, she knew it was true.
"Yeah, me too," she said, smiling as much as he was.
"I'm so glad you're my friend, I wouldn't be having this magical experience without you... I love you so much," he said smiling sweetly.
He really wanted to say so much more, he wanted to tell her how much he loved her, that she made him crazier than he already was, that he wanted to hold her tight and never let go, to kiss her and take care of her, but... He had to keep quiet. They had a precious friendship and if he confessed and she didn't reciprocate, which he assumed was most likely, it would probably make things very awkward between them and if he confessed during the trip, they wouldn't be able to run away from each other, having to share a car and rooms for days. It would be the worst-case scenario.
She assumed that he meant that he loved her very much as a person and as a friend, and nothing more. And he did mean that he loved her in those ways, but he also meant that he secretly loved her as a partner.
"I love you too," she said, smiling in the same way.
They stood for a few seconds looking into each other's eyes in silence, and for microseconds at times their eyes would wander to each other's lips.
Maybe it was the emotions running high, maybe it was the tiredness, maybe it was the night, maybe it was the hormones, maybe it was the way they were cuddled up in that marriage bed, maybe it was that she was sick of hiding her feelings, maybe it was that she was too brave when she liked someone, maybe it was Eddie's words and that she wanted to have even a little faith that she could have more than friendship with him, or maybe it was all of the above at once, but she decided to bring her face close to his, ridiculously slowly for fear of screwing up.
He noticed and almost had a heart attack. He didn't know what was going through his best friend's mind, he didn't know how she felt about him, but according to him, it looked like she was getting close to his face to kiss him, which if it was true, he had to take advantage of the opportunity, so he decided to do the same as her: get close to her face in a ridiculously slow way.
But then they were stopped by noises from the people in the next room, and they weren't just any noises; they were noises of bed springs and moaning, especially from a woman.
They both stopped dead in their tracks, frozen in their tracks, staring at each other with wide eyes and trying not to piss themselves laughing.
"This is ridiculous, I swear," she whispered as she moved slightly away from him and lay on her back, "I can't believe it," she said, pillowing her ears, to no listen the moans.
"Why are you whispering? You aren't the one who should be quiet. Do you want me to knock on the wall?" he asked as he raised his left arm and put his hand on the wall.
"No, let them have a good time," she said, her pillow no longer acting as a hoof against the noise. "Besides, if you hit the wall, you'll break her," she said as he lay on his back like her.
"We're not going to sleep tonight, but not for what we thought."
"It probably won't be long before they're done."
"They'd better."
And there they were, lying on their backs staring at the ceiling, taking in what had just happened, or rather what might have happened... if it hadn't been for the two shamelessly scandalous people who were fucking like rutting animals in the next room. They were uncomfortable in many ways, although they had to admit that the situation was funny at the same time.
The next evening they were in Oakland. They went to dinner and to stretch their legs a bit, seeing a bit of the city, and then to rest at the hotel where they would sleep.
"There are a lot of good looking guys around here," she said as they walked back to the hotel, noticing that there were a lot of metalheads around town, and she assumed that many of them might be like them: not from there, not living there, but had travelled there to attend the festival. "Something tells me they're here for the same reason we are."
He didn't say anything, he knew perfectly well that his best friend was crazy about long-haired men because she said so on several occasions, but still, he didn't think he had a chance with her even if he had long hair.
They still couldn't believe that they were already there and that the next day after lunch they would be at the stadium enjoying themselves like crazy.
The next morning they decided to take the car and go sightseeing in San Francisco, passing over the Bay Bridge of course. They were aware that with how big the city was and how little time they had before they had to be ready to go to the stadium in Oakland they wouldn't be able to see much, but they weren't there for sightseeing and seeing how different it was to Hawkins was enough for them.
The concert started at two in the afternoon.
She insisted that they had better be there as soon as possible to get parking in the stadium car park and to queue as soon as possible, so they drove back to their hotel in Oakland to get their tickets and then to the stadium. They were both wearing Metallica T-shirts.
Fortunately Eddie bought the tickets a few days after the event was announced, so they had tickets to be on the field and not in the stands, which was too boring and far away from the stage. As soon as the gates to the field opened, they and everyone else ran as if they were being chased with a chainsaw to get to the front row, in front of the stage.
"Do you see how I was right to come early?" she asked. They were almost in the front row.
"Yeah, yeah."
"I saw on TV once that this kind of thing happened at concerts in stadiums, at a Michael Jackson concert."
The first band to play was Victory, then Rising Force, then Metallica. At last the moment they had been waiting for the most, the moment they had travelled thousands of miles from their hometown on the other side of their big country had finally arrived.
_______ started screaming with excitement, jumping of joy and grabbing Eddie's arm, almost cutting off his circulation and digging her nails in when she heard The Ecstasy of Gold, a song by Ennio Morricone from the soundtrack for the film The Good, the Bad and the Ugly that they always played at the beginning of their concerts two years ago as they went on stage and prepared to play.
"Are you all right?" he asked, laughing.
"AAAAAAH!" she said, waving his arm.
"I agree," he laughed, "Ride on my back," he said, bending down.
"Oh," she thought the suggestion was a good idea, but she felt bad for him, because he would have to carry her weight for all or most of their performance and he wouldn't be able to enjoy doing headbangs, or pogos, or even raising his hands in the metalhead's signature horns symbol. "Are you sure?"
"Yeah," he said, "ride."
"Okay, thank you very much, really."
"You don't have to give them," he said as she mounted his back and grabbed it.
She had her favourite band member, Cliff Burton, practically a few feet away from her. She felt like if she reached out and lifted her arm she could touch him, even though he was actually about 20m away.
They started playing one of their favourite songs: Creeping Death.
She wasn't the only one going crazy with excitement and singing her lungs out for the song, there were many more people in the audience full of excitement to see the band playing live, and she was happy for them. They were a very good band, and it was one of the first times, if not the first, that they had played in a stadium in front of so many people.
"DIE! BY MY HAND, I CREEP ACROSS THE LAND, KILLING FIRST-BORN MAN! DIE! BY MY HAND, I CREEP ACROSS THE LAND, KILLING FIRST-BORN MAN, DIEEEEEE!"
Eddie looked up and saw her singing loudly with a smile from ear to ear that didn't fit on her face. He had never seen her so happy, and his smile grew bigger. Then he turned his attention back to the group in front of him.
"OH YEAH?" shouted James Hetsfield, the band's vocalist and rhythm guitarist, into the microphone, and then he tilted his head towards the audience and put his hand to his ear, as if trying to sharpen his hearing. He was clearly playing with the audience.
"OH YEAH!" they shouted, and many more.
"OH YEAH?" James shouted again, doing the same as before.
"OH YEAH!" they shouted again.
"FUCKING RIDE THE LIGHTIIIIING!" shouted James into the microphone, and he and the rest of the band started playing that song. "HEY! HEY! HEY! HEY! HEY! ARE YOU FUCKING OUT THERE?" he shouted raising his hand, encouraging the audience to be loud when they were already halfway through the song. "HEY! HEY! HEY! HEY!" he shouted in the same way almost at the end of the song, "I CAN'T FUCKING HEAR YOU!" he shouted as he put his hand to his ear. "HEY!"
Then he walked away from the microphone and stood next to Cliff. They were both doing headbangs and were perfectly in sync without even trying. Meanwhile, Kirk Hammett, the band's lead guitarist, on the other side of the stage was going more his own way.
When the song was over James walked over to the foot of the drum kit, where Lars Ulrich was standing, and picked up a small bottle of beer, probably fresh and alcoholic, and walked back to his microphone.
"ROCK AND ROOOOOLL!" shouted Eddie, and she laughed and shouted back.
"ARE YOU DOING ALL RIGHT?" asked James, and everyone shouted, "We've come here to kick some assess! [ . . . ] You know Cliff Burton over there?" He asked the crowd, pointing to his bandmate, the bass player. "Everyone, "Hey Cliff, how ya doing?"" he said waving his hand in greeting.
"HI CLIFF!" she and a few others shouted.
James stepped away from the microphone as he took a sip from the bottle of beer he had just picked up next to the drum kit, and Cliff began to play a bass solo while doing a light headbang, his head bent low and focused on the strings of his black bass while his hair moved incessantly, as did his fingers.
The best words to describe that bass solo were "Epic", "Legendary", "Magical", "Iconic", "Mind-blowing"... And it sounded like he was playing thunder instead of an instrument. ______'s eyes and mouth opened slightly without her noticing, and the hair on her body stood on end. Absolutely everyone was shocked, including Lars, who forgot to start playing the drums, and Cliff himself had to turn around and tell him he had to start playing. As soon as Lars started playing the drums, Cliff came back and played another epic bass solo.
She would recognise that rhythm anywhere, in any situation. It was For whom the bell tolls, and it was a song entirely written by Cliff. The smile on his face throughout the whole show, but especially during that song, was priceless. He kept doing headbangs, moving around the stage, gesticulating with his hands and singing to himself. You could tell he was excited to play that bass solo and his song in front of so many people enjoying it.
Then they started playing The Four Horsemen, a song from their first album, and it seemed that she wasn't the only one who was running out of voice, because she noticed James' voice faltering a bit.
The song was followed by Fade to Black, despite a boy in the audience shouting out Whiplash as a suggestion.
"Thank you! That was Fade to Black, from the album Ride the Lighting...! ...ARE WE GOING TO FUCK UP TODAY OR WHAT?" The crowd screamed in response, and he threw the pick at a person in the audience. "Good catch! ...WANT DESTRUCTION?" the audience shouted back in response. "By the way, this one goes... There's no other way, on the Kill 'em all album. We want to hear you scream! This song is called... SEEK & DESTROY!" The crowd screamed again for the third time, and more than the previous times. "I can't fucking hear you," said James pretending to be disappointed as the crowd sang the chorus. That was the song where the crowd was the loudest.
And last but not least, and finally for the fan in the audience who kept shouting it: Whiplash.
"THANK YOU SO MUCH!" said James as the song ended, "THANK YOU!
The crowd started screaming "Metallica!" non-stop, and seeing that they wanted more of them and that Y&T weren't ready to go on stage yet, they were allowed to play more songs. They chose to play half of Diamond Head's Am I Evil? and Motorbreath.
"Good day, whatever!" said James, waving goodbye to the audience. "Cheers! Thank you very much!"
As they left the stage, Eddie crouched down and she got off his shoulders.
"Well, we can go now," she said jokingly. "Thank you very much. I'll give you a massage later."
"Don't worry about it."
"That was amazing, my God!" she said as they walked out of the stadium after all the performances were over.
"I told you you had to come!" he said. "Thank goodness I convinced you into it."
"But can we talk about Metallica's performance? Oh my God, it's still not sinking in!"
"Cliff's bass solo in the intro of For whom the bell tolls made the hair on the back of my neck stand up," he confessed.
"Me too, man! And his smile throughout the whole song?! I love him, he's a genius and super adorable, I could tell he was living it up."
It took them a while to get out of the car parking and around the stadium as it was packed. Being from Hawkins, they had never seen so many cars together and so much traffic.
"Where do you want to go now?" he asked as he drove. It was still daylight, but it was late afternoon. "Are you hungry? Shall we go to dinner?"
"I'm not hungry yet, are you?"
"Neither am I."
"Not as hungry as the concert, but I can't wait to go to the beach and see the ocean. I'd like to see the sunset there."
"Then there we go."
They crossed back over the bay bridge and missed directions to the locals, peering out of the caravan windows. They were told that the best beach to enjoy the view, including the Golden Gate Bridge, was Baker Beach, so that's where they went.
They arrived at just the right time, at sunset. They took off their shoes and for the first time felt the sand under their feet and between their toes. The ocean breeze made their manes and their wide shirts move as the wind wanted them to, and for the first time they smelled the salty water. The eyes of _______ were fixed on the sun hiding behind the Pacific Ocean.
She decided to take her camera out of her bag and take a picture. Meanwhile, Eddie was looking at her. He thought she was prettier than the sunset. When she finished taking the picture, she put the camera back in her bag, put it on the ground and looked at the sunset again for a second, then looked at Eddie.
"This is the best day of my life," she said, teary-eyed but smiling.
"Hey hey hey," he said worriedly, "why are you crying?"
"I'm crying from happiness," she said as she smiled at her friend's concern and ran her fingers across her eyes to wipe away the tears, "it's a good thing."
Eddie put his arms around her and kissed her head repeatedly. She was too adorable, she could handle him. He loved her madly.
"It's the best day of my life, too," he said when they broke apart, and he placed one of his hands on her cheek, rubbing his thumb gently to wipe away the trace of the silent tear that had fallen down her face seconds before.
They both couldn't wait to tell the other that they loved each other, that they loved each other madly and not just as best friends, to kiss... But the fear of rejection and ruining the moment, the day, the trip and their friendship outweighed those desires.
"We haven't tasted water yet, how is that possible?" he said, grabbing her by the shoulders, trying to make her laugh and trying to distract himself from the impulse he had felt to confess and kiss her at that moment. "Come on!" he said, taking her by the hand and making her walk towards the shore, leaving her slippers, socks and bag behind.
"It's warm," she said, slightly surprised with her feet in the water.
"It must be because it's been in the sun all day. How about a swim? It's perfe-"
"Ugh, something touched my foot!" She said in disgust, lifting her foot and moving towards him.
"It's seaweed."
"I'm not taking a bath," she said, still disgusted.
"Because of the seaweed?" he asked, raising one of his eyebrows and smiling mockingly.
"It's too disgusting... For that I prefer swimming pools or bathtubs."
"It's just a plant, but a sea plant," he said, bending down and picking it up. He stretched out his arm to pull her closer but she pulled back as if he was holding a cockroach, and seeing how her body and face reacted, he couldn't help but laugh as he let go the plant. "Look, there's a very clean area over there," he said pointing with his head as he approached her, and while she was distracted for a second looking at the area he had pointed out to her, he bent down and grabbed her behind her knees and her waist, like a prince carrying his princess in a fairy tale that mothers told their daughters in bed before they went to sleep at night.
"What-" She didn't mind him grabbing her like that, in fact, she obviously liked it if it was him, but she stopped liking it when she saw Eddie start to go into the sea, into an area with too much seaweed for her liking. "Eddie, no! Don't even think about it!" and he laughed a wicked laugh, like when he saw his fellow Hellfire Club members in distress in a Dungeons and Dragons battle.
"Don't be a pussy!"
"Eddie I'm literally a pussy!" she said refering to her vagina.
"Not everything could be perfect this day, baby!"
"Eddie, if you drop me there, your uncle will never hear from you again! And I'm wearing clothes, not a bikini!"
"So what? The clothes are drying."
"Not in this air and it's getting dark, and I don't have a towel."
"Weeeell," he said, turning around while smiling and setting her down on the shore, on the sand.
They walked back to where they had left their things and she sat down on the sand. He decided to sit behind her, wrapping his legs and arms around her, resting his head on her shoulder.
"You're stupid," she said, annoyed but smiling at the same time.
"And you love me for it," he said, poking her lightly in the side with the tip of his index finger.
"Yes..." He sighed deeply, "very much, as you have no idea, much to my disgrace," she thought.
It was getting colder and colder, so they decided to go somewhere for dinner and then to the hotel to rest, trying to catch up on sleep while they were snuggled up to each other, as they were used to.
The next morning Eddie woke up with a horrible neck ache from doing so many headbangs and some back pain from holding _______ during Metallica's performance, so before leaving the hotel she lay on top of him on the bed and gave him the best neck, shoulder and back massage she could. She was smart and knowing how much her neck would hurt the next day and how fragile it was, she decided not to do headbangs.
Then they headed for Los Angeles and by lunchtime they were there, on Venice Beach with a few litres of alcoholic beer they had bought, and now they had their swimming costumes and towels on (and sunscreen, of course).
"We had rock and roll..." he said, referring to the festival, "we've had 'drugs', if we can consider them drugs...", he said, throwing his hands up in the air, one with a bottle of beer and a freshly lit cigarette in the other. She had forbidden him to bring weed for fear of being caught in a checkpoint. "The sex is the only thing missing."
"I don't feel like fucking any guy here," she said, "they all look like Barbie's boyfriend."
"And they all look like Barbies here," he said half-heartedly, to her surprise.
"But Barbies are pretty."
"Have you seen the sculptures of the ancient Romans? They're made of rock, they're quality and there are few of them. On the other hand, there are a lot of plastic ones, of poor quality and copies of each other. I prefer a woman made of rock."
"How do you know that, Shakespeare?" She asked with a mocking smile. "I thought you were bad at history."
"Yes, but not at art."
"Anyway, even if we wanted to fuck with someone here, I don't think they'd want to fuck with us."
"Speak for me, but not for you. You're beautiful."
"I'm not that much."
"Said the one who always has several guys behind her."
"But they're not Kens because I'm not a Barbie, I'm not popular."
"You are popular among the "weirdos" at school, and you know it, don't tell me you're not."
"Well, I didn't say I was ugly, I admit it, but..."
"You're beautiful. End of discussion."
"Well, all right, if you say so..." She looked away, holding her smile and blushing a little, "Thanks, I guess. You too," she looked back at him.
"Oh, you think I'm a pretty girl, too!" He said in a squeaky voice and put his hand to his chest, pretending to be surprised. "Thank you very much! Aren't you roasting? Shall we go in the water? Or are you still terrified of seaweed?"
"Mm..." Yes, actually yes, she was too disgusted by that.
"At least come and soak your feet, right?" he asked as he stubbed out his cigarette in the sand and got up.
"Well, okay," she said, doing the same as she made a bun with one of the hair ties around her wrists.
"The tide brings the seaweed to the shore," he said, pointing to it as the two of them stood there soaking their feet, "but look, it's all clear up ahead. You only have to go the first few yards. I can carry you and get you there without you touching any seaweed."
"Uh..."
The beach was full of people and she was embarrassed to be seen being carried, as if she didn't have the legs to walk and go into the water on her own. It would be more embarrassing if they found out how disgusting the seaweed made her feel, but it was not her fault that she found it disgusting, especially as an inland girl who could only swim in clean pools. But then she thought that she shouldn't give a shit what strangers thought of her and that she didn't want to miss the experience of swimming in the Pacific Ocean with her best friend after an epic and unforgettable trip, so she accepted the proposal.
"Well, okay," he thought he was going to carry her like he had carried her at the festival the day before, but he carried her like he had carried her on the beach in San Francisco, like a princess. That was a little more embarrassing than being carried like a little girl on hia back. "How are you not disgusted by stepping on them?" she asked, disgusted, referring to the seaweed as he began to walk deeper into the ocean.
"They're just plants," he laughed, "you act like they're cockroaches."
"But their touch is disgusting."
"I don't think it's that bad."
"Well, lucky you."
"You know there are people who eat them?"
"Good for them," she said indifferently, and he laughed again at her answer. "Oh, it's freezing!" she said, referring to the water when he was already deeper in, the water coming up to his waist, and she was wetting her butt.
"It's not that bad! Besides, what did you expect? Don't be a pussy!"
And when he finally reached the area without seaweed, he suddenly let her go, making her scream at such an abrupt change of temperature. She, annoyed, splashed him with her arm. He laughed.
"It would have been worse little by little, if you do it all at once it's less bad," yes, he was one of those who jumped in the pool, "or did you want me to baptise you?" He closed his eyes, shut his mouth, covered his nose with his hand and bent down, putting his head completely in the water. When he pulled it out, he shook her hair like a shampoo advert and splashed her a little.
They stayed on the beach most of the day, until it got dark and they went to the hotel where they would be staying that night.
On Monday morning, 2 September, they would start the journey home, back to Hawkins. It was a bit depressing, as they didn't want the trip to end, they had had too much fun, and on top of that they didn't feel like going back to school, especially as they had to repeat their last year.
It was the second time that Eddie had repeated his last year and the whole group of friends from ______ had graduated and left town, but at least they would be in the same class together.
The last night they spent together they were sad for that very reason, because it was going to be the last night they would sleep together. And the last morning they spent together Eddie woke up before she did, so knowing how little his best friend wanted to go back and start her last term again, he decided to wake her up by tickling her, making her squirm in bed, crying with laughter and screaming for him to stop.
They returned to Hawkins on Saturday evening. Eddie helped get their luggage out of his van and into their house, and her mother offered to stay for dinner with them, so she could listen to the stories of the trip told by the two of them. Knowing that his uncle would not be home when he arrived because of his work schedule, and knowing that his best friend's mother's food was better than anything edible in his house, he gladly accepted the invitation.
"The beaches were amazing. The one I liked best was the one in San Francisco, because of the view of the Golden Gate," she told her mother when the three of them were at the dinner table.
"But she was afraid to go in the water because she was disgusted by the seaweed," said Eddie, "and the next day in Los Angeles I had to carry her like a Disney princess to get her into the water without being brushed by any of the seaweed."
"I wasn't afraid, you exaggerator!" she said in her defence, "just disgusted."
And then it was time to say goodbye. They both felt it would be a long time before they would see each other again, but in reality they would see each other in two days, on Monday morning at the school.
"I had a great time," she said in front of him, holding his hands, looking at him and smiling wistfully beside his van, parked in front of her house, "thank you for convincing me to come, thank you for everything."
"Thank you for coming," he said, looking at her and smiling in the same way, squeezing her hands and then letting go to give her a long, tight hug. "I'll see you Monday at school, okay?" he said as they parted.
"Unfortunately," she didn't even have a spark of desire to go back there, who would? Only popular people or people who find it easy to study or the poor bastards whose validation depends on having high numbers on papers after spewing out useless data for everyday life. "Goodbye," she said as she began to walk backwards, waving her hand as a final goodbye, and then she turned around. He stood there, watching her walk away from him and through the door of her house, making the last direct eye contact with her eyes quickly before she closed the door behind her.
As much as she was looking forward to seeing her mother and being in the comfort of her home, and especially in the comfort of her room and bed, she felt that she had missed something of utmost importance along the way, that she was missing something important: it was him, and the post-concert, post-trip depression. The same thing happened to him, and on top of that his uncle wasn't at home to greet him when he arrived from dropping off ______ at her house, but he knew that was a likely thing. He would see him on Sunday at noon, as he had a night shift, and in the morning he slept.
Their beds were supposed to be their greatest source of comfort, especially after almost two weeks of travelling around the country, from motel to hotel and back again. So why couldn't they sleep? They were not stupid, they were aware of their feelings, but they didn't think it would affect them so much. They missed each other, they wanted each other to be there beside them, lying down and cuddling. He tried to hug his pillow but it wasn't the same. She wanted to hug a crappy stuffed animal he gave her off the arcade hook a year ago but it was too small to be cuddled.
Eddie could have perfectly well drugged himself to calm down and fall asleep as soon as possible, but instead he decided to do something even more stupid: get out of bed, leave the house, get in the van and drive to his best friend's house. Hopefully she was still awake, hopefully they could sleep together that night, hopefully he wouldn't make a fool of himself in front of her for having such a need like a little kid.
"Shit," he thought as he got out of the van, which he had parked in front of the house. He didn't see any light inside, everything indicated that mother and daughter had already gone to bed in their respective rooms.
But then he thought that just because she was in bed didn't mean she was already asleep. She decided to go to the side of the house and stand under her bedroom window. He bent down to the floor in search of pebbles to throw at the window to get her attention in a quiet way, without waking her mother or her neighbours.
He threw a pebble at her window, calculating his aim with his mind and throwing it hard enough so that it would reach the window but not break the glass even a little bit. It didn't rattle against the glass because there was no glass, the window was open because of the heat, but he thought that wasn't a problem, and maybe it was more effective for the pebble to go inside her room.
As it happened, the pebble ended up inside her room, bouncing on the floor, making noise, but he didn't know that for sure, he didn't know if that had woken her up if she was sleeping or if it had caught her attention enough to make her get out of bed and look out the window to see what was going on, so he decided to throw another pebble, and just as he was about to throw it, she looked out of the window.
"Eddie?" she asked in a whisper, surprised and confused. "What is it? What are you doing here?" He dropped the pebbles and took a few steps forward. It was the moment he was waiting for, what he had planned and wanted was happening, but he opened his mouth to speak and nothing came out of him. He didn't know what to say, because there was really a lot he wanted to express. "Do you want me to come down?" she asked, and he nodded his head quickly, but it was dark and she couldn't see it very well, so she decided to ask. "Yes?"
"Yes," he answered, "please."
"I'll be right there, wait a second," she said, who had to put on a pair of trousers because she was in her panties, go downstairs and get her keys.
"No hurry," he said as he moved away from the window. He took a deep breath, trying to calm himself. The longer it took her to come down, the more time he would have to calm down. He was restless, more than usual. He never used to get this nervous before playing in front of people from the school.
He heard the door of the house open and close and she approached him with the keys in the pocket of the shorts she had just put on. Crickets could also be heard not far away, and the leaves of the trees rustling in the thin breeze.
"What's the matter?" She said, approaching him with concern. "Has something happened?"
"No, no, it's all right," she saw how nervous and uneasy he was and knew he was lying, but she took his hands to calm him in every way. He gladly agreed, and he did calm down somewhat.
"So?" she asked, even more puzzled.
"Well... You see... I know it's stupid, but... Well, you know me, don't you? I'm like that, I can't help it..." There was a brief silence in which he didn't know what to say, or rather how to say it, trying to find the words in his mind while she looked at him and waited for whatever he was going to say. She didn't really know what to expect from him, and the situation was strange. "I couldn't sleep and I think it's because I'm missing you by my side," he laughed nervously again. She smiled and tightened her grip.
"The same thing was happening to me."
"Really?" he asked in surprise.
"Really."
"So...? Are we sleeping together tonight?"
"Please and thank you. At your place?"
"Okay."
"I'll come in for a moment to write a note to my mother for when she wakes up tomorrow and doesn't see me at home," he said, holding up her hand, pointing to her house with her thumb behind it, "okay?"
"Sure."
After what she said and did, they rode in his van to Eddie's house in absolute silence, no music, no talking. They didn't need to, and they didn't have anything to talk about since they hadn't seen each other for only two hours. The silence was not uncomfortable, they wore smiles on their lips and their hair swayed in the breeze coming through the lowered windows.
"If your uncle sees me and finds out that we slept in the same bed, he'll think badly," she said as she climbed into his bed and snuggled against him.
"Let him think what he wants, I don't care," he said as she settled her head on his arm, "he'd be happy and everything. Your mother is not the only one who matches us," which was true. Some people in town, especially in high school, just assumed the two of them were a couple.
"Yeah."
He started stroking her head, or rather her hair, with the hand on the arm she was using as a pillow. The other was on her back. They were pressed against each other. He had his neck in front of her face, and his tattooed chest exposed. They both felt at last at peace, completely calm and ready to sleep if they wanted to, but they didn't want to, they wanted to enjoy this moment of being conscious.
"You could have fallen asleep smoking weed but you didn't, why?"
"You're my favourite drug," he dared to say. The night made everyone feel vulnerable and sensitive, and he was no exception. Maybe he shouldn't listen to the things that went through his mind at night, but there were times when he couldn't help it, and that was one of those times.
That phrase and him going to her home to tell hee that he needed to sleep with her definitely had to mean something, something good and important, but she couldn't assume that either if it didn't come out of his mouth in a more explicit way. She didn't want to get her hopes up, make an Oscar-worthy movie in her head, and then get the shock and the downer.
Luckily for her, Eddie spoke without her asking any questions.
"There's something else I wanted to tell you..."
"What's that?"
"The problem is... I'm afraid to tell you."
"Whatever it is, you can tell me, Eddie. I love you madly and I'm going to be there for you no matter what."
"I don't know how to express it either..."
"So, if you can't put it into words.... Express it with an action," she said, believing where he was going.
Emboldened by his best friend's words and the late hours of the night, he decided to move the hand on her back to her cheek. With his thumb he brushed her lips to find out exactly where they were, for they were in their room in complete darkness, unable to see each other even if they were inches away from each other. Then he raised her head slightly and bowed his head, and at last did what he had wanted to do for more than half a year: he kissed her, confessing at last his deep feelings for her. She quickly returned the kiss, while a big smile formed on her lips.
"So... Is that what you wanted to tell me?"
"Yes, for a long time," he said, leaning his forehead against hers.
"How long?"
"More than half a year ago."
"Well, it seems we're in sync even for that."
"Do you feel the same way I do?" He asked, surprised and confused but happy at the same time.
"How do you feel about me Eddie? Please tell me, I want to hear it come out of your mouth," she said, now she was caressing his cheek.
"I love you. You are my Arwen to my Aragorn. When I hear love songs I can't help but think of you. You make me so happy just to be by my side. You are beautiful in every way and I have so much fun with you. You are not only my best friend and the person I love the most after my uncle, you are the woman of my dreams and I think you are my soul mate" with every sentence he said she got more emotional and it was hard for her to hold back the urge to cry with happiness, while he was still not processing that he had just kissed her, that his kiss had been reciprocated and that he was finally telling her out loud what he'd been keeping quiet and so deep inside for so long, "and I can't wait to fucking graduate so I can start working a full time job and save up to get married and live on our own and together in our own house, our own home. ...Although any place is a home if you're there," he suddenly heard a sob and felt a drop fall on his arm, the one that was being her pillow. "_______?" he asked frightened with fear that he had completely screwed up.
"I love you so much," she said crying out of pure happiness, her heart couldn't fit in her chest from all the happiness she was feeling, "you have no idea how happy you make me right now."
"So you're crying from happiness again?"
"I couldn't cry for anything else," and now it was she who jumped up and kissed him. Then he hugged her tightly.
"Do you want to be my girlfriend?"
"You didn't even have to ask."
"I wanted to ask you, I've wanted that for a long time and to hear a yes for an answer from you," she smiled even more, almost laughing at what he had just said.
"Yes, silly, I do."
"Now I'm completely yours, more yours than ever, more than I've ever been."
"I'll say the same."
They kissed again, and then he moved his free hand to her pillowy arm, and took off one of the three rings he wore. He took off the skull-shaped one and handed it to her, leaving it on her hand. She could tell which ring it was by touch.
"I want you to have it from now on, as a token of my love and our relationship."
"Thank you," she said, putting it on her thumb, as it was too big on the rest of her fingers.
Little else happened after that, just a few more kisses, caresses and the occasional playful touch but nothing more. They were exhausted from the journey and finally felt at peace, ready to sleep now that they were together physically and romantically.
#stranger things x reader#stranger things x fem!reader#stranger things x you#stranger things x y/n#stranger things fanfic#eddie munson fanfic#eddie munson x reader#eddie munson x female reader#eddie munson x you#eddie munson x y/n#eddie munson#joseph quinn fanfic#joseph quinn x reader#joseph quinn x you#joseph quinn x y/n#joseph quinn#stranger things#fanfic authors#fanfiction#fanfic#ao3 fanfic#ao3 writer#ao3
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If I Could Give You the Moon, I'd Give You the Moon
I'm obsessed with this angst I've created. Part II of Know It's For the Better
Based on Phoebe Bridgers' Moon Song
Daryl stumbles slightly as you guide him along the quiet streets, his arm draped heavily over your shoulders. He’s drunk—more than you’ve ever seen him—and his weight shifts unpredictably as he leans too far to one side, forcing you to readjust.
“Y’don’t gotta hold me like I’m some old man,” he slurs, his words tumbling together in a low drawl. “Still got my legs, ya know.”
“Yeah? Tell that to the pavement you almost kissed back there,” you reply, your tone light but strained as you try to keep him steady.
He barks out a laugh, loud and sudden, then mutters, “Ain’t my fault these damn streets’re crooked.”
“They’re not,” you say, rolling your eyes even though he can’t see it.
He tilts his head toward you, squinting like he’s trying to focus, and grins—a real, lopsided grin that you’re not used to seeing. It’s different from his usual smirks, less guarded, and it makes your chest tighten.
“Y’look real nice tonight,” he says, his voice softer, slower. The words hang between you, catching you off guard, but before you can say anything, he adds, “Too nice t’be draggin’ my sorry ass home.”
"Weren't you the one who offered to walk me home? Now I'm carrying your 'sorry ass'," you tease, your tone light as you try to deflect from the compliment. You’re not sure if he realizes what he just said—the slip, the way he noticed how you looked.
Or at least, the first time he's ever said anything about it.
The thought makes your heart launch into your throat.
You’ve seen Daryl in all kinds of states—angry, wounded, stone-cold sober—but this version of him, loose and unguarded, is something else entirely. His walls are gone, every word spilling out without hesitation, and you can’t help but let yourself take it in, selfishly cataloging every soft laugh, every crooked grin.
When you reach your porch, he steps back, swaying a little as his arm falls from your shoulders. His hands fumble at his sides, like he’s not sure what to do with them. Then his eyes land on yours, and for a moment, the playful grin fades.
“Don't gotta always take care’a me,” he murmurs, his voice so low you almost miss it.
You shake your head, offering a small smile you don’t really feel. “You already do the same for me."
He doesn’t argue, doesn’t speak. Just stares at you like you’ve said something he doesn’t know how to answer.
And then he steps closer.
His hands, rough and callused, come up to your face, cradling you with a fragile kind of care, like he’s holding water in his palms. Like he’s afraid that if he grips too tightly, you’ll slip through his fingers, yet if he lets go, he’ll lose you entirely. Every touch feels suspended, precarious, as if the moment itself might shatter if he doesn’t get it exactly right.
“You’re good,” he says suddenly, like it’s something he’s been holding onto for too long, his thumb brushing your cheekbone, “Too good.”
There's no doubt he can feel your heart thumping against your neck, the pounding having to be pushing up against his fingers where they brush the soft skin under your jaw.
"Know I shouldn't--know it's for the better that I stay far away from ya," he whispers, like he's talking more to himself as his eyes continue to search your face, "But I can't stop thinkin' of...thinkin' what it would be like..."
“Daryl—”
Then, his lips are on yours in an instant—desperate, reverent in the way they push against yours.
For a second, you’re frozen, your mind spinning too fast to make your body respond. You want to—God, you want to—but the shock keeps you locked in place. His lips are hot and firm against yours, moving with a kind of unpracticed urgency that steals your breath.
The kiss is so Daryl, everything you expected and somehow more. Clumsy, a little haphazard, but so earnest, so real, so alive. You’d never believed the romance novels you’d devoured about kisses that made sparks fly, but this… this proved them right all along. Electricity seemed to crackle between you, only for you to realize it was you humming, the vibrations of your approval thrumming softly through your joined mouths.
When his lips parted and his tongue tentatively brushed against yours, your body finally remembered how to move. Your hands slid up, grasping the solid muscle of his arms, and his whole frame shuddered under your touch.
And then he froze.
His breath hitched, his body stiffening as if something had just yanked him back to sobering reality. In an instant, he pulled away, his hands falling to his sides like they didn’t know what to do anymore.
His breath, warm and uneven, carried the faint scent of whiskey, brushing against your flushed face as his eyes met yours. Wide and uncertain, they searched your expression like he was trying to figure out what he’d just done.
“Shit,” he muttered, his voice rough and low. He cleared his throat, stepping back quickly, the distance between you feeling sharper than it should. “Night.”
And just like that, he was gone, leaving you standing there, lips tingling, your heart racing, and no words to fill the space he’d left behind.
The next day, you find him on the porch, sitting on the edge with his crossbow resting against his knee. He’s fidgeting with a bolt, turning it over in his hands like it’s the most interesting thing in the world.
When he hears your footsteps, he glances up briefly, his expression unreadable, before quickly looking back down. “Mornin’,” he mutters, his voice low.
“Morning,” you reply, stepping closer. You hesitate before sitting beside him, keeping some space between you.
The silence between you stretches for a moment, the sounds of birds in the distance filling the quiet. You try to think of what to say, but everything feels too uncertain. Like you're not sure if you should just say it outright or wait for him.
You should ask him.
The words hover in your throat, right there, but they refuse to come out. Did he remember the kiss? Did he remember the way his lips pressed against yours, clumsy but so full of something it made your chest ache? Did he remember what he whispered, his voice rough but so sure of his feelings when he confessed his unrelenting thoughts of you?
The memory burns in your chest, every word, every touch of his fingers and taste of his lips is seared into your mind. You need to know if it meant something—or if it was just the whiskey.
He breaks the silence first, letting out a short, almost nervous laugh. “Man, I was… somethin’ else last night, huh?”
“Do you remember much of it?” you ask softly, your heart picking up its pace.
You stare at him, searching his face for something—anything—that might tell you he’s lying. That he does remember. That those words weren’t just a drunken slip. But his expression is unreadable, his focus locked on the crossbow like it’s the only thing in the world.
Your throat feels tight, your hands curling into fists in your lap. “Daryl…” You pause, the words catching before they can escape. You want to ask him about the kiss, about what he said. But the fear of what he might say—or worse, what he won’t—roots you in place.
“If I, uh…” he starts, his voice softer now, “if I said or did somethin’ dumb… didn’t mean nothin’ by it.”
Your breath catches, and you nod quickly, forcing a brittle smile. “Right, course."
And just like that, the warmth of the sun from the morning sky feels as cold as ice, seeping into your skin and draining the last bit of life from you.
You stand abruptly, brushing your palms against your thighs to give your hands something to do. “I should get going,” you say, keeping your tone light even though your heart is still pounding.
Daryl finally looks up at you, his eyes catching yours for a brief, fleeting moment. There’s something there—uncertainty, regret, maybe even a flicker of longing—but it’s gone too quickly to be sure.
“Yeah,” he says, his voice low and rough. “See ya.”
You hesitate, your feet rooted to the porch even as your body screams at you to leave. The words are still there, trembling on the edge of your tongue—Did you mean it?—but you swallow them down, just like you always do.
Turning away, you step inside, letting the screen door close softly behind you. As soon as you’re out of sight, you press your back against the wall, closing your eyes as the memory of last night washes over you again.
His words replay in your mind, over and over, as if they’re branded into you. You clutch the hem of your shirt, willing yourself not to cry, even as the ache in your chest spreads like wildfire.
Because as much as you want to believe he meant it, his silence today feels like an answer.
And yet, you know you’d still give him anything—everything. If he asked, if he even hinted that he wanted it, you’d tear down the moon and hand it to him without a second thought.
But he doesn’t ask. And so you don’t offer.
#the walking dead#daryl dixon#twd daryl#daryl#the walking dead daryl#daryl x reader#daryl twd#daryl fanfiction#daryl one shot#daryl dixion imagine#angsty daryl dixon#Daryl Dixon angst
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Adam gently picked Lucifer up and carried him to the bed, where he made him sit.
With another towel, he started to dry his hair and face. Lucifer blushed as he was nearly chest height with Adam. He wanted to touch him so badly, but the thought that Adam would reject him was enough to make him start coughing again.
Adam: You're okay, bud. You're okay.
Adam rubbed his back until he stopped coughing. Lucifer was exhausted, feeling even more weak after that coughing fit.
Once Adam had finished drying his hair, he stepped back and looked down at Lucifer.
Adam: Would you like me to dry the rest of you?
Lucifer thought about the question he wanted him to for multiple reasons, but he didn't want Adam to be uncomfortable.
Lucifer: I... n-.
Adam: Lucifer. I don't mind, alright? I want to help you, I hold none of this against you, okay? If you're comfortable with me, do it, I will.
Lucifer: ...Y-Yes, please, A-Adam.
Adam smiled and tucked a strand of blonde hair behind Lucifer's ear. The act made Lucifer blush madly.
Adam left him on the bed as long as he could. He dried his arms and legs before doing his back. He was so careful. He didn't want to jolt or toss Lucifer around and make him cough or struggle to breathe.
Adam: Okay, you'd want to dry your bits, yeah?
No. Lucifer wanted Adam to do it. But he nodded and let Adam help him stand so he could finish drying himself.
Adam: Okay... do you have any pajamas or anything- oh. Okay, those uh...
Lucifer had snapped his fingers, and a litte fluffy duck onsie popped up onto the bed.
It looked adorable, Adam wasn't jealous or anything.
He helped Lucifer get dressed, and his heart melted at how cute the king looked. He couldn't believe this was the bastard that was actively beating his face a few months ago. But for some reason, the thought that Lucifer was so much stronger than Adam made him twitch in his pants.
Adam cursed himself. He was meant to be helping Lucifer, not getting turned on.
Lucifer: S-Sleep with me?
Adam: Uh- Sure, yeah.
Adam got Lucifer in bed and hopped in next to him. Lucifer pawed at his chest, making Adam blush. He did what the king wanted and lifted him softly onto his chest.
Adam: Try and sleep, okay man?
Lucifer nodded: C-Can you... tell me a story...?
Adam: A story? I don't really know any.
Lucifer: T-Tell me about Eden... please?
Eden. A place Adam craved but also wanted to forget.
Adam: ...Eden, huh? Y-Yeah, okay... I'm sure I can think of something.
He didn't want something too funny that would make Lucifer laugh, and he didn't want anything sad. So, he told Lucifer about the time he first found a lion.
They were his companions after Lilith and Lucifer left hi- the garden. The lion held him together when he was breaking.
But he won't tell Lucifer that.
When he saw a soft, weak smile on Lucifer's face, he knew he went with the right story.
@things-arent-what-they-seem66 @fanofstuff01
Hanahaki Disease
The day of the failed extermination was the end of many things for Lucifer. The end of Heaven's terror, the end of his isolation, the end of the Exorcists, but most importantly, it was the end of the First Man.
He had his fun, taunting Adam for anything and everything, his weight, his wives, his attitude. He knew there was no way in Hell Adam would ever be able to beat him, let alone hurt him. But it was fun to rile him up, fucker did put his hands on his daughter. He deserved it.
Feeling Adam's mask break open under his fist was so incredibly satisfying, but not as much as feeling the bones in Adam's face crack and snap as he landed blow after blow. Just when he was about to do something horrific with his Hellfire, he felt a warm touch on his shoulder.
Looking up, he was met with the face of his daughter, begging him for mercy. Of course, Lucifer felt a teeny tiny weeeny bit bad when he saw how much golden blood covered Adam's face and clothes. But that feeling quickly left when he crawled out of that crater to spew more self-righteous bullshit.
After that, everything was a blur. The sudden silver blade sticking out of Adam's chest, to him falling, landing on the ground with a sickening crack. The tiny maid on his back, stabbing him over and over. And laughing while doing it.
Lucifer watched as an angel with one arm ran over to Adam and pulled him onto his back. Her begging was hard to listen to. It was affecting a deep part of him that was making him feel sympathy for the pathetic bastard. He couldn't have that.
So, he threw them out. Every single one of them. Forcing the army to leave their dead to be feasted on by the cannibals.
Lucifer helped his daughter rebuild. He even cooked some pancakes for everyone.
It wasn't until he was sure everyone at the hotel was asleep that he went out to check the carnage. At least, that's what he told himself. But it was a useless lie as he beelined for Adam's body.
Lucifer felt sick as he saw the state of it. Most of his stomach was gone, his limbs bitten down to the bone. But the most painful thing was his wings. They were broken, snapped, and torn apart. Eaten.
He was eaten.
Just when he thought it couldn't get any worse, the man twitched. And groaned. A bubbling noise escaped his throat, golden blood running out of his mouth.
He's alive.
Lucifer knelt down, his hand hovering just above his chest. It was definitely raising and falling. It was very weak, but it was still happening.
That's when Adam said his final words.
Adam: ...h-hate... you...
Lucifer watched as his eyes became empty. No feeling or purpose behind them. No holy light.
The day of the failed extermination was the end of many things for Lucifer. The end of his old friend. The end of all the good memories he had from Eden. The end of his hope to repair things with Adam.
But, the day after the failed extermination was the start of many things for Lucifer. The start of seeing Adam's chest slowly start to raise again. The start of Adam's stay at the Hazbin Hotel. The start of Lucifer's own personal Hell. The start of hanahaki disease.
It started the first day Adam was at the hotel. The man looked broken and defeated. He didn't even argue with Charlie when she told him about what he'd need to do to stay here. And she wasn't holding back, and neither was Maggie.
She had her spare pressed into Adam's neck the whole time. But the light in his eyes was gone, the need to fight back. He was still healing and was quite the horrid sight, but even that didn't give him any mercy from the members or workers at the hotel.
He watched Adam limp his way to the room Charlie said was his. The whole time, he said nothing, even when Lucifer made a few small threats to his life of he tried anything.
Lucifer felt a tickle in his throat, and he coughed and cleared it.
Lucifer: Hm. Weird. Better not have caught anything form those fucking angels.
Little did Lucifer know that was the start of something truly horrible.
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